The Andrew Ho Weblog

I am not dead & you must [like] this page!

2011-11-23T14:33:00.004+08:00

Remember I am still blogging on facebook! This blog is not dead! It channels you to a new one not dictated by google! (But another Jew call Mark Suckerbird!)

The New Black!

2010-12-28T12:33:00.005+08:00

Let's face it, blogging is so 2005. Facebook is so popular today they even get their own movie. So I'm shifting to a newer platform, a testament to show that I can move along with time by creating a page to write all I want, when I want at nobody's expense.

How many times do we have to visit a blog we like just to know that there is no update. When you do that 100 times, it kinda gets old and we start to be fed up. Fret not with liking a facebook page, when there's an update, you'll be automatically notified via your newsfeed. Hassle free for you, pressure free for me, I no longer have to force myself to update 4 times a week just to maintain readership, and you don't have to waste your time by visiting again and again just to check for updates. This is the new black.

So like my page if you'd want to get some updates from me and perhaps a little reading pleasure to fill in your time.

Cheers,
Andrew Ho,
A new label, the same great taste!

I have been fine

2010-11-15T21:41:00.001+08:00

"From my facebook note"

I have been fine. That's if you do care about my well being. Although there are times when I don't feel great, nobody wakes up every morning feeling like he is the king of the earth. I am a very regular person, almost like you. Of course there are probably a few of you who are reading, you probably wouldn't want to agree that we are the same. Mostly because you are an arrogant person thinking that your acheivements should be respected and admired. It often puzzle me if one is so great, why are they spending time acknowledging me disacknowledging them?

All greatness is built upon humility. Not the other way round.

To write something correctly and to write something interestingly isn't the same thing. I have been interesting.

This morning over breakfast my pastor jokingly said a new covenant Rabbi is like an oxymoron. They can't co-exist together. I replied religiously, saying which is why this is something new, a new creation. We all laughed. And then I said a guy from church in west Malaysia cannot understand why I had been angry with my former pastor, as he had experienced similar thing. I said that's probably because he's like 30-40 years old when he left church? I was 13 when I got hammered with ridiculous counselling, spent years being discriminated in a church I faithfully attend as believing in ocultic doctrines. My teenage years were beautiful just as it was painful. I was just a kid.

But anger can only last that long, we all learn how to forgive in time. Now we laugh over it. There are no wounds, only scars. I keep them to remind myself that the Lord has been good. Just as He always will be.

I am so sorry if I am not smart enough to write something more intellectual or impressive. I'm known to be a very simple person. It's very difficult to live a life trying to impress people and gain acceptance all the time. You're only sensational when there're people to love and hate you at the same time.

So I have been fine. I do sports, I eat my vegetables, I go to church and read the Word, I got some time to spare. I got plans, I plan to stay calm and keep on believing that miracles happen to people who believe them :o)

Live About Being a Christian

2010-11-07T00:57:00.001+08:00

If you don't take time away from the routine of the day and reflect a little about your life. It can slip away so easily you wouldn't even realize it. So every now and then I would sit down like this, I would take some time off, just to see how am I going about in life. Am I doing what I am supposed to do, or have I gone astray.

I do not have a very regular life, not the one I wished I had nor would I choose the same road twice if given another chance. We don't get to choose everything in life, esspecially those pre-determined factors. But how we deal with it or Whom we choose to believe, that we determine.

I guess by now you have realized I spelt the word Whom with a capital letter. The greatest decision I have made in life, to say it plainly is to believe in Jesus Christ and God Himself. I am not going to convince you to join Christianity, my imperfection is glaringly revealed in my lack of interest to bother about your salvation. I am here to declare the gospel, in the clearest way, as accurately as I know how, not to sell it.

I'm afraid the church that I know of, might not be the same as you have perceived. For a start church is not a place where we go and learn what is right or wrong. People know what is right and wrong. They just don't have the power to do the right thing all the time. We all struggle in this area. And some of us feel bad about ourselves for the things we've done. We don't need another religious teacher to remind us of what we should and shouldn't do. What we need is a Saviour.

There are no formulas on how to be a good Christian. Mostly because there is never such a thing as a good Christian. One can be better than the other, but none can be good enough.

My former pastor used to ask us to wake up at 5.30 a.m. in the morning to pray. Read the bible at least one chapter a day.They call it spiritual dicipline, they also have spiritual warfare from time to time, it was mostly chanting against the air. It is believed that when you do such things, somehow you will get closer to God. They did it in vain. I know so because I did it with them.

I am not asking you to try another method that works, I am asking you to please stop trying. We tried so much, we got so full of ourselves. We wanted to do so many things. For a moment I thought I was God. Trying to save this world from spiritual warfare. Have you gone astray?

This is the gospel. Jesus loves me so much, His love was beautiful, but my sins were ugly. Against a God that cannot possible tolerate my sinful ways, Jesus paid a ransom to save me. He paid up His life, so that I may have mine. I cheated death.

And so it was the story goes, it was never about me. It was and still is, about Him. I don't go to church to learn what I should do, I go to church to learn what He has done. There is nothing left for us to do because Jesus has done it all, it is therefore - finished.

Our lives is a finished story written about on a cross. One might worry about what He should do now, because I've clearly said so that there is nothing left to do. But human, being human, we must do something less we can't rest. I say you stand on the mount of crucifiction, and you look upon the now empty cross. Perhaps if you stared long enough. You might just realize what I am trying to say all this while.

Judging Sermons

2010-10-18T17:28:00.002+08:00

Super Short Talk: I posted this on faccebook note a few moments earlier. Indeed, facebook has taken blogging away. We all have to face that.

This is an unqualified opinion written by a self-proclaimed rabbi and how he thinks that he shall one day be the greatest preacher this nation has ever seen or heard or will ever see again in a long long time. If you're already offended by the first sentence, there is no reason for you to read on for I have nothing to impart on you. Haven you read the scriptures, where Jesus said that we shall do greater things than He did? Of course you read it, but you have problem believing it. And that by far is not your biggest problem yet. Before you go on, it is advisable that take a deep breath and make yourself a cup of coffee, you have to relax. I am not your every day reading material.

When I used to blog actively during the blogging hayday, I was a very inspirational one. Do you know what is more inspirational? Bak Kut Teh. I love Bak Kut Teh and myself have a fine taste for food. While having a conversation with my pastor and elder over Bak Kut Teh last weekend, I've decided to write an article to show the world how much I love food. Quoting from the food critic in 'Ratatouille", he said "I love food, I love it so much if it is not good, I will spit it out of my mouth". I may not yet be the greatest chef ever, cooking the best food, but I've spitted quite a good amount of sermons throughout my years of being a young Christian.

Rule no.1, there is only a good sermon or a bad sermon. Anything between it, is rubbish. You can either be hot or cold but if you are lukewarm, nobody's gonna drink you. But some of you would say, I like it lukewarm. That's because you are not a good food connoiseur and you are far away from being a serious CRITIC! If I happen to attend your church gentleman, trust me, I am the worst congregration you can ever get. There is no balance between law and grace. 99% Grace mixed with 1% Law, Legalism, Old Convenant thoughts, Religious ideas, is rubbish. Whatever is of fear, of insecure or just a long confusing message, is not right. There is no justification for it, you as the preacher must be accursed. And if you're not ready to hold the poupit, perhaps you should join me sitting among the congreation. I don't want to see you cursed, I want to see you blessed!

You don't understand Andrew, in order for you to fully understand the dept of my sermon, you must first understand this this this this this and so on. Well let me ask you a question which you will not be able to answer. When you preach a sermon like that, who on earth is going to get saved? Since anyone who listens to you, have to understand a lot of the bible first before they can receive, perhaps you should share your thoughts in my synagogue among the holies of holies instead to the general public. As a preacher it is your responsibility to break down your sermons to the simplest and practical form ever. So that everyone can receive it. You cannot say your cooking is amazing, when you cook a dish so complicated, people don't even know how to eat it or which part to start eating. If you're a good chef, you cook a dish that everybody enjoys, as simple as that. No justification, go and improve yourself.

As a preacher, and this is my unqualified opinion. You don't owe it to the congreation for a good sermon. You don't owe anybody anything. This is not your battle, you're not the boss in charge. God is, it is His battle, let Him fight it for you. Let Him anoint you, you carry your responsibility and do accordingly to His Word and He will deliver the victory to you. And this is the same in all things. I visit different churches, and if there is a universal truth, I believe that the poupit is so important. That a church, the management and whoever in charge should NEVER just let anybody preach on the stage. Being generous is one thing, being stupid is another. If I'd let other random preacher feed my sheep poison, I bear the responsibility for killing them.

My pastor share with me also a story about a mega church in Singapore, I will tell it plainly. I believe it was Copeland ministry which were invited to speak in New Creation Church. A seminar it was, in this Seminar, Copeland ministry, clearly from the word of Faith circle made a mistake while preaching on the 2nd night. They were talking about love, and focused the whole idea of love being that we must love God. It is we, us, we and us and nothing else. It is clearly imbalanced. It's like trying to talk about sex and focus the whole idea into self-masturbation. Which is wrong. Sex is not like that. So on the next day, Sunday, the pastor of New Creation Church in charge changed his sermon immediately, and explain to the congreation the right concept about love in the bible, focusing back to God, that God is love and that it is Him who first loved us, therefore we are empowered to love Him back and so as others. It doesn't matter if it was the Copeland ministry. A bad dish is a bad dish.

I do not write to condemn, I write for people to hate me. And if in all the hatered towards all the offensive sentences that I have used. If you would grab only one truth or a simple right thing in my thousand words long article. My job is completed. From your friendly neighbourhood Rabbi, Andrew Ho.

Stupid People

2010-10-10T23:51:00.003+08:00

Live goes on like it should, the way we wanted it, the way we don't want it to be. It has been a while since I write anything. It's probably been a while since I can settle down with a little bit of sound mind. Being young is being ruthless I should say.

I have to say that blogging had seen it's hayday. But due to the lack of intelligent people around the world, it seems like reading has become a less popular hobby compared to facebook. Today I want to talk about stupid people.

Stupid people are those people that do not understand things. They are the people who spam your chatbox, they are the people that have a very low understanding about anything. They are short sighted, they say what they think, they think what they say, they cannot go beyond a very superficial surface of thinking things. This people are often failures in life and cannot survive without the support of their parents until they are 55 and finally die a meaningless life. That is a stupid person. And there are many of them around us.

Next I would love to talk about my hatered for stupid people. What can I say, stupid people is very irritating. They are like the pest of the world that needs to be destroyed. They must be eliminated before they destroy us. We must educate them, we must elevate their low state of mentality. Their 3rd world mentality, we must save them before they destroy themselves and us together.

Stupid people exist. They are reading this. Forget blogging, go make babies.

I AM LEGEND

2010-09-05T01:19:00.007+08:00

My works are philosophical, they are not biblical or clinically tested. They cannot be applied to real life situations all the time. They are to be pondered and hypothesized in an ideal world.

I have never studied philosophy. I have never read a book from Socrates, I only learn about Confucious from the movie Confucious. But I know Socrates did not read a book from Socrates too. And Confucious's teaching defer much from his teacher Lao Tzu. So I know if you're good at something, you are gifted. You don't need to study it in an in depth manner, and even if you did, you may as well do it in vain. Which explains why many people ended up doing different things than that they majored in college.

My works are simple for they are meant to educate simpletons. This is by far my GREATEST PIECE OF WORK THIS WORLD HAS EVER WITNESS. AND IT WILL FOREVER REMAIN ALIVE FOR ALL TIMES. Liken to the dead sea scroll which made up your bible. This will last many lifetimes, and many people will read and remember me by this. They will remember me in their history, in their literature, maidens will sing songs of me for this master piece. Movies and documentaries will be made, Leonardo De Caprio will be asked to play ME. and this URL will be auctioned in millions. With this, I proudly present: The Best of Teoh Beng Hock Inquest.

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Namewee Should Go to Jail

2010-09-02T14:52:00.001+08:00

Namewee should go to jail. There are many ways to condemn racismn. But making a video asking people to suck cock is not one. He learnt nothing about chinese culture in Taiwan. A shame to chinese people and school. What difference does it make if we fight like that? What's next, throw shit at people like our neighbouring country?

Tonight

2010-08-16T23:49:00.002+08:00

There is a saying that the wants of men is an unending journey. Once you had acheived what you wanted, there is always a feeling of emptiness inside. A vacumm that voids your heart. And then you'll want to start it all over again. We always wanted more, we always wanted to know what's next, and we don't know when to stop. Perhaps we shouldn't stop.

But a sane man would stop once in for a while, and think about what he has done all over the years. About the things he has done to others so as himself. And pounder for a long long time.

I just got back to kuching after first year of University. Frankly speaking I don't miss home that much. Not the places, places are just places. Without the people and the company, places have really very insignificant meaning. Sometimes it's just sad to visit an old street you used to walk on a lot. If you know what I mean, nostalgia does not always give the best feeling.

Moving back can be very difficult once a person has moved on. Even if it were a better choice, it is still difficult. I think the human nature has the tendency to move forward in almost all the things they do. We don't usually like to look back. We probably don't like to remember, the mind, in some sense are made to forget things. The best therapy ever is to simply forget things.

A year in University had given me much experience in dealing with people. I can say that I've grown up a little more. I've never felt time pass so fast in my life. In a twinkling of an eye, I had neglected blogging for a year. Not that it is very important, I'm just mentioning.

When I close my eyes in the night, and I think about all the possibilities of my future. None of them really fancy me. And we all most probably ended up with the question "why? why my father is not Li Ka Shing, I want an easy life that requires less thinking!" And I really don't know what to expect. But I know, someday, somehow I'm going to make all these worthwhile. I don't know how, I just know I will.

May you feel the same too =)

My Insignificant Life

2010-08-13T21:43:00.005+08:00

There are many insignificant things that I want to talk about. There are so many of them sometimes I wonder why would people bother to read. The pursuit of happiness is a road filled with many fatal errors. In this pursuit people tend to lose balance, we all forgot what are the more important things. When career, work, relationships, friendships, beliefs and everything else comes together in a mix. Most people focus on one or two of these rational goals and disregard the others. So in the end, what did we live up to?

When you have a rich father, and I got no problem with that. Chances are that you can acheive material success more easily, provided that you don't ruined his wealth. When you don't have a rich father, you probably have to work your way up. Maybe your father aren't rich, but your children's father can be rich. Think it like that. But maybe you can work all your life and never be a billionaire, but it's okay, you have sufficient to eat and spend. As this world was never made to be fair, most people cannot be super rich, thank God we don't have to be super rich in order to acheive happiness.

Relationship is a bitch. There is this saying, the one you love most is probably not going to end up with you. Of course, I mean, how many people can miss California marry since so many people would "love" her. There is no theory that fits all. But most vagina can fit your penis, so, like I said relationships is a bitch. The best advise I can come up with, and it's true to everyone, is really: don't be too stuborn.

Belief I have 3 paragraphs to write, but since most of you wouldn't read, I would summarized it to 3 words instead: Believe in Jesus.

And these are the few things, not all of them, but a few that made up our lives. How we manage them, and how we see it decide the level of satisfaction we get. Ultimately it makes our lives meaningful.

There are many insignificant things I want to talk about, there are so many of them when you add them up. They made up your significant life.

2010-08-06T18:01:00.003+08:00

You can make me as rich as a billionaire. But I still wont want it if I had to look like Jho Low!

How am I doing

2010-07-25T20:57:00.004+08:00

I had just read kennysia.com a moment ago, and he was discussing about people who likes to call themselves celebrities when they are not really one. That was just one interesting idea, it made me feel like calling myself a celeb too! But of course, my humble nature would never allow it, calling myself a celebrity when I am not is just too much. I am not a celebrity, I am a superstar! Woooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. And that is 6 seconds of your life you will not be getting back reading me.

It has been nearly a year since I entered University. And I have to admit that life being busy means lesser blogging. Of course when I said busy, I was more refering to busy playing rather than studying. But thank God I still update this piece of blog from time to time. Although the interval may be quite a while.

I have learnt much since I came here. Not academically, but I believe meeting more people helps a person grow up. Especially those from different places and culture. I am currently still enjoying it while waiting for my internship. I applied a few in Kuching but had not receive a reply.

If there is one thing I dread now, it will be graduation. Who needs to graduate when he is having so much fun? But again it is inevitable. A big part of me has always dread about growing up, growing old, take responsibility and all those good things. I guess most of us do. And we aren't given a choice really, life just drives us about. We can either be the passenger or the driver. But we aren't allowed to stop the car.

I am going back to Kuching next month for a short 10 days. And coming back again, am also spending Hari Raya in KL. To sum it up? Nothing much.....

And oh ya, mum was not feeling well. Her right leg felt weak says she. and she fidn it hard to walk. She Went for a brain scan and the doctor found 2 black dots as small as half the size of a 5 cents coin. Doc said it is unlikely to be a tumour. But will have to observe and asked her to scan again 3 months later. Her blood test however was fine. So I would keep her in prayer. And even if it was just a short 10 days, I had to go back.

For we all have lives and our challenges.

Why is Life Special?

2010-07-06T15:21:00.009+08:00

My friend asked me while I was cleaning the kitchen this afternoon, "Andrew, do you think life is special?" I hesitated for a moment to answer. Because I know it is a difficult question, a difficult one to explain and also to understand. People like to ask all sorts of questions sometimes, and although I can give a good explanation, many times I just ignore them because I don't believe they have enough depth, knowledge and critical thinking skill to accept what I have to say. But since he asked, I thought I would just try to enlighten him and the rest of you who may be reading.

For a start, you cannot answer the question "why is life special" in one sentence. Many people who ask questions expect a quick answer to their enquiry. Let me tell you something, in a world of philosophers, it takes 30 hours to think, 20 hours to rethink, 10 hours to recheck the logic to give you a simple statement. To give you a one sentence answer to whatever complicated thoughts you have is simply impossible.

So to answer the question, there are 3 parts you have to carefully understand. I will try my best to make it as simple as possible. Number 1, instead of telling you why life is special, you need to know first what kind of people think that life is meaningless. I always say, "if life is without God, there will be no meaning to life. If we are all an accident of science, and that this life on earth is all we have, it doesn't matter if I die today, tomorrow or have lived a little longer. At the end, it will all mean nothing. All the emotions, all the attachment, the love of families, friends, they will all be meaningless. It is better to die immediately than to go through all that unnecessary steps before we finally die". In short, people who don't believe in God will not find much meaning in life. Life will not appear very special to them. This is provided they can think deep enough to realize that. The general population cannot think like that.

Part 2, people who believe in God but has no idea who and what God is or they have a wrong conception of God will not find life special. Yes, one can say, I believe in God, so what? How does it give more meaning to life? Well let me explain, if you believe in God, you are no longer an accident of the nature or science. It's not, owh, suddenly, you appear as a baby and you have a life! No. It is not like that. You are not an accident. God made you. God gave you life. Of all the people that could live, God especially created you. Not anyone else, but you. Does that make you feel more special already? And because you believe God exist, life does not end on earth, you would as well believe in enternity. You would believe that there is much more than life on earth.

You might again say, ya ya, I heard the eternity stuff before. If you do good you go to Heaven, if not you go to Hell. What so special about that? And that is what lead us to part 3.

People who do not understand God and His nature will not appreciate life. They always see God as this Punisher or this Judge that is ever ready to punish them when they do wrong things. People who think like that do not have a solid foundation in the understanding of the bible. A person can go to church for 20 years and not know anything about God. I can guaratee you that because I myself had gone to church for 10 years. And I have spent a great amount of time in church. I would like to throw you a question. On the cross, Jesus had die for our sins. He had took all our sins on the cross and God had severely punished him. So all our sins were dealt with. Now, back to 2010, supposedly if you had done something wrong today, this "sin" they you have commited should be dealt with and punished 2000 years ago on Jesus, right? So if God punish you again, isn't He punishing the same sin twice on two different people? Does that make sense?

For those of you who has a weak foundation in the bible, you should get confuse by this moment. And to obtain and understand the answer for "why is life special", you have to talk to me personally. That is however a priviledge I don't easily give out. But for those of you who can still read, I would tell you here.

When you see God today, you cannot see him as the punisher anymore. He is done with punishing people. Today He is a God that is FOR you not AGAINST you. When you see life like that, would you think there is no meaning to life anymore? When you understand that there is a God who loves you, a God who bless you, a God who cares about you, who created you at the first place, who made you for a reason, for a purpose. YES, God created us all for a reason and a purpose, and what purpose and what plans God has in store for you is for you to find out. It is for you to seek Him. In his Word He say, Seek and you shall find, Ask and it shall be given. So you aren't created just to live and to die. You have a God that is gonna back up you, that is gonna lead you and MAKE A MEANING OUT OF YOUR LIFE. A God that is not a punisher and someone who cares only how to torture you. No, God don't do those things anymore. THERE ARE STILL SOME FUCKING PREACHERS OUT THERE THAT PREACH HE DOES, A LOT OF THEM, AND I CURSE THEM FOR SPEAKING THE WRONG THING. I CURSE THEM FOR CONFUSING PEOPLE. AND I LOOK DOWN ON THEIR LACK OF REVEALATION AND THEIR WHOLE BEING OF EXISTENCE.

And when you have understood more of this, you would have find that life is more special. And it is not something static, it is a progress. Which means, the more you understand God and His love, plans and his Word, the more you will see that life is indeed special. Different people will understand this and will apreciate life at different level. Mine perhaps is higher, yours is lower but I hope we all end up in the same place someday.

You see, this is what happen when you want an answer to a difficult question, do you have to brain to understand it just a little?

FOR THOSE PEOPLE WHO CAN ONLY THINK AT MONKEY BRAIN LEVEL, HERE IS A ONE SENTENCE ANSWER: LIFE IS ALWAYS BORING, IT IS UP TO YOU TO MAKE IT INTERESTING! (THIS IS NOT THE REAL ANSWER, IT IS MEANT ONLY TO SATISFY THE LOWER LEVEL LESS EVOLVED HUMAN BEING)

SO DON'T MISS OUT LIFE!

2010-06-28T23:39:00.005+08:00

I was afraid to face the future. Not because of how uncertain it is, I was afraid if it will happen just as I predicted it to be. The thought of graduating university, find a job, work, earn some money, find a mate, mate, have kids, and live a quiet and peaceful life. That thought itself scares the heck out of me.

I've always wanted life to be a little different, a little more exciting. A little more unpredictable. I don't want to end up just as I plan it to be! Of course, I was educated, I was taught if you don't plan, you plan to fail. But what if you plan and everything falls right into your planning? And that planning wasn't an amazing plan to begin with. It is a normal plan, it was a plan drafted by the norms of the society. It was a boring plan.

So plan something different I thought. We need to give room for more surprises in life. We can't shut every door and discount every opportunities. We have one life to live and we ought to live it as daringly as we could. I want to walk out this door and tell the world that I exist. I want to walk out this room and make meaning out of my life. Wouldn't you want to do that? Why give a chance to be small when we all could be much BIGGER?

Instead, if we were to just sit down and wait for surprises to knock at our doors, it will hardly come. We don't wait for surprises we make them. Life is always boring, it is up to us to make it interesting. SO DON'T MISS OUT LIFE! DON'T LET IT SLIP THROUGH YOU, DON'T WAIT TILL IT'S TOO LATE, DON'T WAIT TILL WE MISS A CHANCE.

"If we don't change direction soon, we will end up where we are going"

Top 10 Andrew Quotes

2010-06-25T19:45:00.002+08:00

10) They didn't remember me as someone bad, they didn't forget me for I wasn't average.

9) I didn't mean to hurt you, I only return the amount of hurt you first gave me.

8) I thought we could be friends forever, I guess forever means a very short time.

7) I was afraid you would forget me as time moves on, I realized you didn't. You just didn't care that much anymore, which is worst.

6) Random people who met randomly would most probably end up randomly.

5) I have gotten rid an addiction with a new one, now the only way to ged rid of the new addiction is to go back to the old one.

4) Life is about sex, sex is about life. Both building lives, and ruining lives.

3) If life is like a drama, mine's a comedy and you are the joker.

2) A longer penis doesn't mean a higher stature. It only means you can suck your own cock much easier.

1) Someday I'm gonna be great, and I will pay you a special visit when that day finally comes. Don't worry, I will track you down.

2010-06-17T22:17:00.004+08:00

It's been a long while since I blogged. That's probably because it's been a long while since I had time to sit down like this. Life is a never ending story, until it really ended. Others will still have their life to continue with. So to talk about life is like watching a hokkien drama that has 900 episodes. We all give up bothering about it half way.

Politics is also a never ending story. After following it for years, you get kinda fed up with the same character. Sometimes you just feel like grouping them together and throw them down the ocean. Both the government and the opposition. They are like these flies flying around your ears. Annoying it is.

It is the World Cup now. And the performance of all the countries in general really make it looks like a World Shit Cup. It seems nothing and no one is so legendary after all.

I've recently learnt how to solve the rubic cube. I can solve one in like 5 minutes now or lesser. The sultan of Brunei decided to divorce his Malaysian wife. I guess people who has too much money are prone to changing wives. It is an absolute understandable but unexcusable mistake.

I have been watching movies. Have been visiting the cinemas quite often. Will be catching Toy Story 3 tomorrow. But I didn't even watched the 1 or 2 before. Not quite a cartoon fan, sometimes we do certain things not to entertain ourselves, but to entertain people around us.

Anyway, furious indian wife slices off husband's penis.

2010-06-13T01:21:00.003+08:00

Quoting Kenny Sia:

"We used to always hang out together, help each other out, tell stupid jokes and laugh our heads off. These days I gotta watch my words so much. If not, things I say might be misconstrued as something else."

and also:

"A place is only as meaningful as the company you have over there"

and I think it makes so much sense! [Like it]

None Taken

2010-06-09T21:01:00.002+08:00

I hesitate a thousand to update my blog because updating facebook status is more fun.

I am currently looking for an internship to do at the end of the year in Kuching or KL, depending on what job is offered. If you are a Barrack Obama and you happen to click on my blog by a terrible mistake, and if you'd like to offer me an INTERNSHIP in the white house. I am happy to accept your offer. If not, work in Najib's office I also don't mind. If not, WORK AS ANWAR'S PERSONAL AIDE ALSO I DON'T MIND. I BELIEVE I WONT GET SODOMIZE. EVEN IF ANWAR WANT TO ALSO I THINK CANNOT, I COULD HAVE EASILY BREAK A FEW OF HIS BONES WITH ONE HAND. HE'S A 60+ YEAR OLD MAN. EVEN A DOG IS NOT AFRAID OF THAT.

So.......... I really hesitate a thousand to update my blog. Recently my emotional has been stable and I don't feel the urge to bring anyone through any emotional crap.

Really, life sucks sometime, but not all the time. Fix it.

And of course, if you get too bored with reading my blog. You can always add me on facebook! And this is not some fans profile. I am not so popular yet. Soon will be but not now. So you can add me on my personal profile straight. How good.

KISS means Keep It Simple Stupid

2010-05-28T01:21:00.004+08:00

As years go by and we grow older, we understand that as life gets older, responsibility too grows heavier. Challenges grow bigger and reality seems to get more real.

I too like you wish I could live among my imaginations and fantasy everyday. Without the slightest worries and care. But it isn't so.

When we were children, we live today as today, tomorrow as tomorrow. We gaze into the future and see endless possibilities. We did not worry a bit about life. We did not care about pressure, we didn't know what it was. We did not live to survive, we live because we sincerely believe life was good.

We didn't care about who is richer. We didn't really mind who was prettier, we didn't really differentiate people by their colour. It seems like we had picked up all the bad habits as we grew. Most kids neither smoke nor drink. They aren't addicted to porn or masturbate compulsively. They weren't sexual. They don't hate each other with great hatred. But when we grew, environment and society taught us shit. Since when did smoking become cool? You live a life addicted to a rod of grass. You deliberately jeopardise your own health and other's as well. Which part of you is really cool?

When would we in all our insanity learn how to think properly? Most of us wouldn't. Because when life gets older, responsibility too grows heavier. Challenges grow bigger and reality seems to get more real. Most of us just couldn't handle it.

Keep Breathing

2010-05-17T00:05:00.002+08:00

There isn't a lot I have to say recently. And the reason I am updating today is of course, DAP wins! Politics is like sports, you pick your team and you support them. If you pick rightly, it benefits you. If you don't, you get screwed.

I like to put words in simple form. So that those who read it can understand. Even if it were a very complicated thought. Life is difficult enough, other things should be made easier.

If you'd walk with me for a while. Over a cup of coffee and read the things I have to say. You'd know at the end of the day I had wanted nothing from you. I just wanted to chat and get a few things across my mind.

If we look around us, we wont so much see a world full of love. At least that's what I think. People are always getting angry with people. Trying to find problems. Trust is not common, even among friends there lies doubts.

In these darkness we all try to shine, we all try to burn a little brighter. Channeling a little more positive energy. We all try to smile a bit, when really smiling can be a difficult thing to do. So we're cool.

Being pessimistic is not a way of life. But if you're going through a hard time now. Do not feel depress. You are just as normal as anyone else. Keep breathing. Just keep breathing. There are times I know when it is hard to breath. But if we don't keep doing so, we had chosen to give up before we fail.

So keep breathing.

The M Word

2010-05-08T03:49:00.006+08:00

Human nature does not differ much from each individual, even though they may have different character. It's like masturbating, 90% of all boys do it, 10% lie about it.

There is a saying that all of us are unique. And the truth is we are. But when you put 6 billion of unique individuals together. It makes some of us look very average. I'd like to think that we're all special. But no, we aren't really so. If you think too highly of yourself, it is hard not to degrade others. So I'd like to think that I'm a regular person ~~and I masturbate additively.~~

I like to be frank. There are already too much pretense around us. Some do so to avoid being embarrassed. Some are too shy to admit who they are and what they do, others just follow the norm of the society. There is no norm in the society. We had long differed from it.

And I don't like it. I met an interesting friend the other day who came for a visit in KL. I barely know him but he was far more sociable than anyone I've met before. In a few hours time, we have already started hanging like we've known each others for years. I'm not easily impressed by people. But he was impressive and very frank. I've always wanted to be a little bit more like that. And we all should.

Open up a little more of our heart. Be a little more vulnerable. Get embarrassed a little bit more than we should. And be human.

Don't judge others before judging yourself

Just a Thought

2010-04-27T02:02:00.007+08:00

It's been a while since I updated my life. All I've been doing was really writing some erroneous passages and expect people to read. At this rate, I don't even know if people read me anymore. Well, my life...

....is actually good. Except it being very Indonesian. Like how I've known 2 new Indonesians friends again this week, they came to visit KL on a holiday. I don't usually like people that fast, or so to speak, I don't usually like people at all. But surprising I hanged out with them 3 full days and spent the night in their room. Thank God anyway that their visit lasted a few days. Else I'd be much poorer than I'm now since all the freaking Indonesian Chinese I know are freaking rich. Nobody gets as middle class as me when they have businesses like 11 gold and jewelry shops. Which further inspires me, next time, I should venture into businesses too.

Making random friends is always fun for me. It's like one night stand. You come together, you have fun and then you leave. Perhaps you keep in touch, or else, you just move on. But I'm not so bad though, I do keep in touch with people, if I like you. I'll send you a facebook greeting once a year.

Other than that, I turnt 21. Celebration wasn't so much, just had lunch with friends and hanged out. I bet I wont delight so much in birthday celebration again, because I am really getting older. Before 21, I was "growing up" and not "growing old". You see the difference?

I had an awful long sit at starbucks the other night. Rethinking my life. It's just one of those things I do every 4-5 months. I seldom feel so relax. I really don't. Usual days are just usual days, even when you sleep, you don't sleep in that much peace. Busy days are even out of the topic. But I'm having my holiday this week. So I decided to take time and rest a little. I was just staring at the ceiling, like the one in the picture. I was just looking at them. Like you I see woods lining up in different paterns. And I just thought to myself, the only thing that differenciate those woods is how they line up themselves. Like how we're all people, human. The only thing that makes us different or special, is really how we decided to line up our "paterns". It was just a thought.

So I had quite a lot of thinking about "what am I doing now", "where am I heading in life", "where do I want it to be like" and "am I doing it right". I thought we all should just have a little idea of it. It was just a thought.

Redemption

2010-04-23T00:46:00.005+08:00

If I've ever told you that I do not care. I was lying. And how could we not be bothered in a world which is so far away from perfect. How could you and I let go of the past if we know it will always be repeated?

I wanted you to be right, right all the way. But how could someone like me who is equally wrong wishes something so naive? We always wanted things our way. But we never bothered, not even for a second, to see others as mirrors which reflect ourselves. Your dirt is my dirt, your sin is my sin. But we're all too quick to judge and too selfish to understand.

A soldier was running from his enemies, when he saw his colleagues that ran even faster and even further than he was, he laughed at them thinking they are cowards. Greater cowards indeed he thought, but was he himself afraid? Not everyone could have turn around and fight, most of us had only succumbed to the temptation of the flesh. We ran as cowards, all of us we ran into it.

At the end of the fight, when all things calmed down for a second. We look back and see what we've done. But it wasn't important anymore. Because people died. Because a piece of our soul was sold to the devil.

At this point of time, we needed no more condemnation. We had already condemned ourselves far before anyone else did. What we needed was redemption......

Today Is My 21st Birthday

2010-04-18T02:29:00.003+08:00

And there is no way I am blogging today.

I Can Write Bahasa Malaysia Too!

2010-04-13T03:33:00.010+08:00

Sudahlah lepaskan semua. Aku sudah keletihan mengerjarkan mimpi-mimpi yang tak mungkin berlaku. Sesungguhnya, kalau seseorang harus membuat perkara-perkara yang bodoh untuk menjadi dewasa. Rasanya, aku sudah dewasa.

Semakin hari aku semakin tua. Rasanya selama 21 tahun ini, pencapaianku pun tak seberapa. Kemungkinan kehidupanku juga tak bawa seberapa banyak makna ke atas teman-teman di sisiku. Setiap hari kita kan berubah, aku pernah mencuba sebaik yang aku mampu. Namun sebaik yang termampu masih tidak mencukupi.

Aku lebih pandai dari kalian semua dalam soal berpura-puraan. Berlagak baik, menggunakan bahasa sopan, membilang kata-kata manis. Tidak susah jika aku mahu meminta sedikit cinta daripadamu. Aku banyak mencuba, sesaat yang lalu, aku terpikat sama si cantik. Seaat kemudian, aku binggung kenapa hatiku berubah dengan begitu cepat.

Tanggungjawab itu satu perkataan teori sahaja. Jika kau hendak mencari-cari satu hubungan yang mengasyikkan. Yang serupa cerita dongeng dalam wayang-wayang, tanggungjawab harus diabaikan. Ikutilah pergerakkan hatimu dan bermain sewenang-wenangnya. Jika hatimu diremuk pada akhir-akhirnya. Apabila kamu merasai kepiluan yang tidak terhingga. Kamu seharusnya sedar bahawa kamu harus bangun dari mimpi-mimpimu.

Sudahlah lepaskan semua.....

And for those who doesn't understand Malay, this is what google translate thinks I write!

Woe miss everyone. I am tired mengerjarkan dreams may not occur. Indeed, if one must do these stupid things to become adults. It seems like I have grown.

The day I get older. It seems like for 21 years, not even as pencapaianku. Chance of Life did not bring as much meaning for my friends in the "I. Every day, right change, I have tried best I could. But the best is still not affordable enough.

I am smarter than you all in terms of make-puraan. Good posture, using polite language, counting words sweet. Not hard if I want to ask for a little love from you. I have a lot to try, a second ago, I stuck the same beautiful. Seaat later, I binggung why I changed my heart so fast.

Responsibility is a word only theory. If you want to look for a relationship exciting. Similar tales in the movie-movie, the responsibility should be ignored. Follow the movement of your heart and played carelessly. If your heart diremuk end-end. When you feel the emotion that goes. You should be aware that you need to wake up from a dream-dream.

Woe miss all .....

Super Short Note: This passage is for literature purposes only

2010-04-10T15:27:00.000+08:00

Next week is my finals. So you know what that means.

Philosophically Right

2010-04-03T00:39:00.006+08:00

Super Short Talk: It has been long since I talk about politics, but Chua Soi Lek won the MCA election. So we lose.

Philosophy is a real smart and a real stupid thing. We all know a little about philosophy. We all know about the right things of life. The ones about love, the ones about principles, the ones about how to do things. We all know a little, and we almost never do any of them.

It is exciting to sit down over a cup of coffee and talk about this and that. About the rights and wrongs. It is exciting just as it is nothing. We all know about feelings and about love. And about the right person, but if the world should wait for the "right person" to tie the knot. Most of us will not be getting a life partner at all. It is philosophically right but to perform it is foolishness.

If tonight you have a bad breakup, and it hurt you so much you cannot sleep. It hurts so much you stare at the walls in your room, waiting, just waiting for the feelings to go. But it never does. If you've lost someone and you miss him or her so much. You went down to the mall and you saw something pretty and the first thing you remember is buying for them. If you have gotten to that stage, you'd at least had one valuable lesson about relationship. In an ideal world, I would tell you that what you feel right now is temporary, in a few months or maybe longer, you would finally have to move on. And forget about it, so what you feel at this moment is purely superficial.

To say that makes me philosophically right. But saying that doesn't help. It is as good as I've said nothing. I know it because I've lived through it. You pay a price for a pretty face like this. A dear price.

I've spent nights, depressing nights staring at empty walls. The worst of it is spending a month in my empty apartment with those negative thoughts and emotions in KL while all my housemates went back to their hometown. And I've not really gotten over it. If this is one of the learning process of life, I'd say it sucks. I'd say some people around me sucks too.

It is true that most things in life, are easier said than done. But I know I have to do them. I know I have to summon a little courage here and there. I know I have to learn to be brave. I know I will need a little support from you. I know I need some friends around me. I know foolishness is to ignore all the trees in the forest for one that is already dead. I know it now, but I am not sure if I can still think like this by tomorrow morning.

I was philosophically right. =)

2010-03-31T23:25:00.000+08:00

Today father mother come visit me. Blogging can wait tomorrow. Bye bye.

To be wise

2010-03-24T02:26:00.003+08:00

Note: This post is purely literature and is not intended to attack any person

Today I want to talk about something very abstract. Yet as abstract as it is, it is very true in our lives. The topic is, stupidity has no cure. Some people screw things up in your life. Sometimes it is bad and it makes you unhappy. Do you know why? Because stupidity has no cure.

You try to help these people. You think they could be helped. But no, the more you try to help them, the more trouble they give you. Why? Because stupidity has no cure.

These people lay on their bed at night, thinking about their little dreams. On how they want to get more for themselves. How they want to achieve more for themselves. More money, more glory, more people to admire their little achievement. These people are full of themselves and care little about others. Why? Because stupidity has no cure.

Selfishness is the first trait you will find in them. They neither think nor care about anything else besides them. They would sacrifice you for their convenience. Even if they don't want to, they would still do it. Why? Because stupidity has no cure.

You get angry at those people. But I would tell you my dear, don't get too angry. It is not good for you. There is no reason to get angry at a stone being hard or the sky being blue. Because stone is naturally hard and the sky were painted blue since the beginning of creation. Likewise there is no need to get angry at those people. Do you know why?

People who refuse to think about the big picture is a fool. It is like getting a girlfriend and all you could think about is having sex, a lot of sex with her. You don't think about the future. You don't think about the next 3 years. You think now. You think this moment. You don't foresee, you don't plan. You don't hold responsibility. You are a real fool.

So how do a person becomes wise? Ironically and I would say it is a big irony. It starts from someone realizing how wrong he is. It starts from someone admitting what a fool he is. It is difficult, but let me be the first one to admit, that many times, I am the biggest fool in my life.

Life is Good

2010-03-17T01:01:00.004+08:00

I learnt a few things while growing up. For example when people are in a bad mood, the best way to deal with them is to leave'em alone. Because an angry person don't think logically. A person who thinks by logic at all time is perfect, but sadly these people don't exist.

I also learnt to relax and let go of people and things. Although it is not the easiest thing to do, sometimes we don't really have a choice. Look at the world, look how many people lives with us here. Imagine how complicated it is. People and things change, they change every now and then. If we are too stuborn and we don't know how to deal with it, the only person that is going to end up getting hurt is you.

I also learnt that people do come back together. Not all things are bad. Don't think to the negative extreme. I've seen broken friendship mended. I too have forgiven many that angered me at once. Although I do not think that it is all their fault to begin with (wink*), but yes, forgiveness is the next sweetest thing beside honey.

Being young gives you plenty opportunities to learn. It also gives you plenty opportunities to give up and to fail. I admit in some things, I've failed. I've failed so terribly it doesn't make sense. I've also given up. I don't see it as an absolute bad thing though, sometimes giving up is the easiest solution to our problems. I may give up in some things, but no, I never said we should give up on life. No one should. Because life is good when you believe it is good.

There are also things I have not learn in life. I hear people say in every end is a new beggining. What if I see an end and yet not know where is my next destination? Well, I guess I'll just have to find it out myself. Perhaps it is out there, perhaps it is waiting for me. I just haven realize it yet.

I've also not learn how to control myself well, I have not learn how not to step foot into sinking sand or the world of which I don't belong. But I am learning. And I believe it will turn out good. Because life is good when you believe it is good.....

My Kind of Proverbs

2010-03-10T08:51:00.000+08:00

The inability to learn from the past is the very definition of stupidity. Repeating the same mistake twice is understandable but unexcusable. This is the reason why people fail again and again in different aspects and areas of life.

We have heard probably a thousand times, if we fail to plan we plan to fail. It doesn't necessary mean if we don't plan we will fail. It simply means we are letting the enviroment takes control over us rather than we controling our enviroment. We are not taking chances, we let chances pick us. And most of the time, it's not going to end up well. Because chances hate you.

Goal setting is meaningless if not carried out. Carrying out a plan to acheive a goal is useless unless there is dicipline and consistency. Dicipline and consistency is by far the hardest thing to keep. The human mind is simply not design to keep a set of rules and laws.

A person easily influenced is useless. There is no need to set goals or resolutions. A wavering mind can acheive nothing. Before anything is done he will give up to try other things.

The lack of wisdom is dangerous. The lack of knowledge is equally bad. There is no need to strive, for such, giving up is the wisest and easiest thing to do.

A person who thinks shortly will see little acheivement. We should fear the ones who can see the whole picture. The end is more important than the process. It doesn't matter how you take a poison, you'll still die. So don't, do not be deceived, cease while you can.

A person who sees moral of little value shall in time lower the value of himself. This is the mark of prostitutes. There is no difference between a person who prostitute herself than the person who visits the brothels. They are considered equal. There is no need to pay respect for such. It is a waste of life.

When a person tries to justifies his wrong doings, it shows that he is ashamed of what he does. Do not pity such a person. Let right be right and wrong be wrong. There is no need to compromise truth for deception.

If a person wishes to do evil, advise him against it. But if he insist, let him. For in due time, his wrong doings shall consume himself. Stand still and watch, it will be soon.

Stone

2010-02-27T02:29:00.004+08:00

Sometimes reality can be ugly and difficult. And the hardest part of it all is that whether we like it or not, we have to accept them. Certain things cannot be forced. People cannot be controled, we have to let them be. That is reality. Reality is that things would not always go our way. This world is far from being ideal. So far. Yet, there is so little choice.

I don't like to be involve with people, but then I guess I did get myself involved a little too much. The more friends you know, the more sometimes trouble occurs. I tried to keep simplicity the way of life, but I guess such a thing is easier said than done.

So I learn to accept reality and certain things as they are. I didn't want to but again there is so little choice.

It is true that they say time waits for no one. This quote gets more real as you grow older. As time slip passed you, and suddenly you look back and see those memories you had acquired. They get more and more each day it's scary.

And when you blend time and reality together, you get a life. You get a life that waits for no one and it is real. If you don't face it with a little bravery, if you don't precious it, you're going to let life slip pass you.

So it is time, for me and you to deal with whatever issues that is troubling us now. It is time to make some decisions before we let it consume us. Before we put our feet too deep into the sinking sand of our lives. We have to make concious decisions. To pull ourselves up and to stay strong.

Top 10 Useless Quotes

2010-02-24T00:05:00.005+08:00

10)There was a windrunner, who never stops for anyone. He goes as he pleases to anywhere he wishes. Responsibility was just a word, until one day, he graduated fucking college and realize if he doesn't work for food, he will die. This is the misery of life.

9)Everytime when I faces a challenge in life that I cannot overcome, I say I want to move on. It is really just a lame excuse to hide away from my problem.

8) I like how children play, how they cuddle and how they giggle. I don't understand why grown ups don't do that anymore. Just because we got a little older doesn't mean we have to forget every good that is left in us. And no, being serious is not cool.

7) I could really imagine myself driving down a lonely road in the next 5 to 10 years, probably back to my house to my own woman. I could really see that I'll have to put a lot of focuses on my family and forget some friends. I don't like that.

6) I woke up one morning and realize that the world can be conquered. So I started my conquest, my first step, went back to sleep.

5) I try not to get older each year. I try very hard.

4) The only kind of girls I like are those that I cannot get. I thought I was the only one, and then I realize everyone does the same. So why are there so many married couples in the world? Because when there is no cola drink you drink pepsi, it is still better than staying thirsty.

3) I like to be happy, I think everybody should. Although sometimes it doesn't happen that way, it shouldn't stop us from thinking like that.

2) Fantasy is always better the real thing. Because nothing in this world is that good. So keep dreaming. But some people like to turn their wildest fantasies into reality. So what happens to them? I don't know, I hope they die.

1) I have lost my innocence over the years, but I kept my virginity. Don't even know for what.

It's not a date, it's an apointment

2010-02-17T00:04:00.008+08:00

Contrary to popular belief, I do not get to eat a lot of good food in KL. Thanks to my housemates that are less food conscious and hyper body conscious, if there's one thing they would share with me eating, it will most probably be some universal protein shake or super mass gainer. Their supplement alone cost more than my monthly allowance. And they speak Indonesian. Which in time makes me understand and speak more Indonesian. Still, I have to confess that I like Indonesian more than bahasa Malaysia. I don't know why, theirs' just sound nicer. Of course, you can also attribute that love hate relationship to the government because I really do not favor them. Even in footballs, if one team won for the past 50 years, you would root for the underdogs.

Yes I am back in Kuching for the Chinese New Year. I would be here until Sunday. My last coming back to Kuching during last December for Christmas was great, coming back for Chinese New Year on the other hand is different. I can't help but to feel a little bit bored with the occasion. I know, coming back from a bigger city like KL to Kuching sometimes makes everything feel a little bit slower. But I don't think it's really the problem with the city. Shhh...... don't tell anyone, but yeah, I'm practically just feeling bored because I didn't have a date this week. No. None. I might be happier I guess if I were in somewhere else. Like Jakarta in a city of 9 million. Indon facebook is in a way different from Malaysian facebook.

This is how Indon facebook works for teens, because of the 10 times larger population compared to Malaysia, if you have a nice or over-photoshoped or fake profile picture, everyday there will be 4, 5 , or 6 people adding you as friend. So what you do is look at their picture, if you like it, approve their request, and then go to their wall and ask "mind to intro?" Then try hooking up and ask them out. So yeah, my friends would have 1000-2000 friends on facebook.

Malaysian facebook? Because of the little population there is, divided some more in different states. So in Kuching with 600,000 people. I get 0 friend request on a normal day. And those that added me are mostly................. you see, the larger the population, the higher the chances of getting a pretty lad. This is why you see there are so many sexy looking Chinese hookers in and around everywhere. And the Malaysian population, my god.......

Of course, beauty is just skin deep. But if you see my blog, it's not very deep also la. I am a very regular person. I shit everyday. Most of the time I talk shit. On rare occasion I talk sense. Because life is difficult enough, you take it a little more seriously than it already is, you'll die. A day without laughter is a day wasted. I don't care how rich or poor or how talented or how many business degrees you have. We gotta learn somehow to make our day a little happier because that's the way it should be. For me, I blog. It's therapeutic. For you, you read my blog, it's equally good or bad. Take it either way.

I am sorry I don't get to blog "properly" for such a long time. You know this thing about everybody has a life, life get busy, busy got busier and suddenly nobody has time for others anymore. People somehow grew up and just got sucked into a whirlwind of other interests and commitments. But it'll be great, for us, no matter how distracted we are with everything else and just sometimes get "in touch" back with the world. I am the king of getting in touch, I really am. Most people I know, they aren't pro-active in keeping in touch. Or should I say, Malaysian in general has a huge lack of initiatives (unless it can get them laid). If I don't call them, they never really call first. Which is why most people, by the time they reach 29, they have lost touch with so many of their friends. Sacrificing their youth and spilling their seeds for the so called love of their life that soon will be the worst nightmare and a catalyst of their mid-life crisis. Behold when you're old and saggy, I shall come back and laugh at you. Muahahahahaha.

Ahh, nahh, I just say that because I didn't get a date. Which is really disappointing. Not with myself, I'm great, if this goes on, I will have to settle with the "beauty is just skin deep, get a partner with inner beauty theory", which is irrelevant, and hypocritical. And my computer is infected with virus. So yeah, keep standing baby. Life doesn't end today, we'll keep standing until we see the light. Bye ya! ^^

What Are You Doing Right Now?

2010-02-10T03:29:00.001+08:00

Hello gentlemen, this is early Tuesday as I am writing to you. The clock suggest that it's 3.30 a.m. but I like to think it as 6 a.m. in the morning. Because that's precisely the time when the sun rises. And as every dawn signifies a new beginning, I wonder if every night then signifies an end? Why must every beginning then comes with an end. Sometimes we would rather certain things didn't happen. Sometimes we regret the things we've done, the people we've met, the relationships we got in. But if we were given a chance again, would you still choose to do what you did before? I know I would.

I wonder what you're doing early this morning. I wonder if you see the same sun rises with me at this very time. I wonder what you did last night and if you're still fine. I wonder what happened after we realized that the world is too big and one can only be at one place at a time. I wonder on with no answers. A fool who thought nothing is many times better than a smart person who wonder of unending possibilities. You cannot look for a black cat in a dark room.

So I've learn to live today for today and tomorrow for tomorrow. After very much thought indeed. A person can neither live in the past nor the future, you can think about them. But one will never change and the later would never be the same as you expect. I was thought by wise counsel that I would survive any storms if I would devout my trust in God. So I rest my case in my belief. After very much thought indeed.

Nothing make sense anymore.

The person who writes this (whatever you call this is) is as normal as you are. Normal is what makes us beautiful. Happy Valentines and a Happy Chinese New Year. I know, this is the worst season greeting message ever writen.

Sodomy II

2010-02-03T02:55:00.000+08:00

At last the long awaited sequel to Malaysia's proud and the best production ever is released worldwide yesterday. It is of course non other than "Sodomy II" staring one of my favourite actor Anwar Ibrahim. (I AM A BIG FAN!)

Before you start throwing stones at me, there is nothing to be worried about. I am just an observer, and I quote from Malaysiakini "Among those in court were representatives of Japan, UK, Switzerland and the United States.

Also present were International Committee of Jurists and Commonwealth Lawyers Association representative Mark Tromwell, and the International Bar Association's Jennifer Robinson. There are acting as observers during the trial."

A cold open in a television program or movie is the technique of jumping directly into a story at the beginning or opening of the show, before the title sequence or opening credits are shown. On television this is often done on the theory that involving the audience in the plot as soon as possible will reduce the likelihood of their switching away from a show.

And that was exactly what I was expecting in Sodomy II, but a cold open is not easy to make. Most people doesn't understand performing arts. Especially Malaysians. We only know how to eat, sleep and complain. Nevertheless, when I read the headline "Anwar seeks to subpoena Najib and Rosmah", I knew, he (Anwar) did it again.

On a more serious note, I have all the time in the world to see how this trial works out. And I will be the among many who is privilege to witness how the democracy in Malaysia will live, or how it will die. Anyway, definitely before I close, it is always my pleasure to leave my highly sought after and valued opinion. My comment is no, I don't think Najib and wife will go to the court to testify. The judge will likely dismiss the application base on some altered logic.

Back to my life, I have been playing dota over the long weekend. Peer preasure. Not that I'm addicted to games. I hardly play any games. For any boys my age, most of them are not interested in Anwar's sodomy trial, the only sodomy they're watching is porn. And those who does read the news and care to know the hapenings around them, don't play so much games. Life itself is already a big game to play. And I hardly scored any recently. No pun intended.

I am going back to Kuching for Chinese New Year next Saturday . For most people that complain coming to study in KL, my uni life is not so bad. Got some nice friends to play with and my area sells good food. PORK is widely available. Anyway hometown is hometown, you gotta go back there some day. Even Chin Peng wants to come back. But die la him, I don't really care for communist. BAM! Bye!

Don't Drown On Me

2010-01-27T11:40:00.001+08:00

God might be able to help those who doesn't help themselves, but I truly fall short of the glory of God. It's just plain difficult to teach people who doesn't take things seriously. I was helping a friend in his studies, but halfway down it I realise it was just impossible. A day before exam, he would wake up feeling sick, slept half the day, woke up to go play basketball, came back to sleep, went to gym and came home at 10.25 pm, an hour later, he came to my room and ask if I could teach him. Oh I remember back in my high school days, I would wake up early in the mornings, drove to my friend's house just in order he could help me revise chemistry and physics. It's difficult to help people who don't take things seriously. I sincerely believe people like that should fail in terms of academics.

It is not good to underestimate the value of the people around us. I would be willing just as I have always been keen to learn from every knowledgeable person around me. It can be anything, I'll just pick it up. If you're good at folding clothes, I would learn from you. And that's how we learn. This is an honest confession. To tell you that I'm stupid would be a blatant lie.

Like recently, I learn that if you can make Avatar, you can make anything at all! 911 is a conspiracy! Hahahaha. Years have passed since the conspiracy theory came about, I still find it hard to believe. That's probably because I first learnt it in "southpark". It is a waste of time, really it is to read news like that on the internet. Mahathir is an old man, a remarkable one, he had really lived for a very long time. I think people can actually place a bet on whether or not he'll outlive Lee Kuan Yew. I think it'll be better for these two legendary politicians to share us their secret to longetivity than their views on movies.

Haiti is the poorest country in the world. And they have again just burried 150,000 victims from the earthquake. It is sad. Yes, we may not feel it strongly from Malaysia for we are under-educated and ignorant. But it is indeed sad news. While on facebook...

A blogger was arrested for insulting sultan on his blog, but no action is to be taken on him as he had apologized. As a top-notch responsible blogger myself, I strongly condemn the blogger and his irresponsible action. XD

I just thought I would mention also about the dragon boat tragedy in Penang. My eyes got wet reading the news, not of the headline where it said how many people died, but of the report on funeral services. I saw the boys wearing those Leo Club vest and uniforms, I just thought if I were one of them and if the deceased were my friends, I'd have gone insane.

And that's the check in this week, I'll see you again next.

One Of Those Moments

2010-01-20T02:18:00.000+08:00

Tonight must be the night of nights, because I can't sleep tonight. I've been sleeping too much lately. And when you sleep too much, you'd wake up in one of the odd nights at 2 a.m. And then you couldn't sleep again. And if you're human, at this hour of time, there'll be a lot of thoughts that come rushing to you, all at once. It's one of those time when sex doesn't seem so appealing. It's one of those time. It happens. First to artist, then to those who suffer a bad mid-life crisis. Nah, actually it happens to everyone with an IQ above 100.

It's one of those time you think about life. Specifically your life. And then you think about the lives of others, and how it affect you or how it doesn't affect you. And then you think about your life again. And then you'd feel empty. You'd feel as if life is suppose to have so much more than what you have now. You feel as if you should be out doing greater things than you are now. You feel that there is so much more that you are missing. And then you catch a breath.

Well that's life gentlemen. That's life. It's one of those time and it happens to everyone. Nobody really capture that moment of their life down. Few poets perhaps pen it down in their poetry, but it happens and that's life. I smile at my life. I smile at your life. Tonight I smile to the world and wishes it well. Tonight I smile to the boys and the girls, and to friendship and to whatever good is left in this world and wish it well.

This is one of those time where you would never understand what it is, unless you too experience the same. You're not happy you're not sad. There is no reason to be sad, but there is not much to celebrate. Nothing is what it seems to be. None. And that's how it feels.

Alamak

2010-01-13T10:42:00.001+08:00

I think that West Malaysian should take us East Malaysian as a role model. For one thing, we never fought over the word Allah. And for the second, we can live together much peacefully rather than having a dogfight every now and then, which is very unlike to our west counterparts. It comes to show that East Malaysian understand better the knowledge of maintaining peace and unity. We took the higher road of saints.

What's next with the Allah word issue? I am not taking sides as this is a sensitive issue, but what if our west counterparts has successfully ban the word from their Christian brothers. What do you win? Take an airasia flight down to Jakarta or Bandung and you'll again find millions of Indonesian Christian using the word Allah in their churches. Obviously these people are not well schooled, or else they'd have known that the world is much bigger than your 950 square feet apartment. Which is why I discourage people who study theology solely and disregard other principles and fields of studies. God gave us a brain, don't waste it. Think. Think a little further if this whole issue is politically motivated or has been politically abused. Think if you are a politician how can you use this scenario for the benefit of your party. We can read that Anwar is using this issue to slam the goverment, which is cunning but not entirely baseless. The government which first failed to draw a distinct line regarding the protests and practised double standards does not help. Now hooligans are burning churches for fun, and then you come out and condemn them. Superfluous.

On the other hand, 2 people are involved in the 2 stolen jet engine. So I guess each of them carried one engine and swam to Argentina for resell. Relevant enough. What I don't understand is why punish them? It's just two people. Why don't you put a big bucket of shit in front of KLCC and let everyone go there and eat. It would have bee better than this jet plane drama. Admit that you're corrupt and keep quiet. If you want to battle corruption, battle it seriously. It seems to me like the more goverment tries to battle against corruption, the more stories of corruption we hear. Ridiculous. Did you know that Hong Kong's ICAC had in many years ago sent their officers to study our "anti-corruption" strategy and we contributed partly to their now corruption free goverment? They learnt from us and became master while we still remain, whatever this is. I'm restricted from calling the goverment bad names directly due to my imaginary increasing influential power which doesn't exist. Damn.

And what's in store for us this coming week? Perhaps another series of attack or another series of protest, anyhow the joke continues. And I say peace.

As reported in Time magazine

A=Average, B=Bad, C=Crap

2010-01-06T08:32:00.001+08:00

Last Sunday I returned to KL in order to start my new semester. How nice would it be if life can stop at one pleasant place and never move on. But that doesn't happens too much doesn't it. You move from one place to another, one phase to another. December was great but this is January, it will come again but only once a year. If only everyday could be Christmas and every night is New Year. It would be pleasant.

I'd wish all my friends can be at one place at all time. Around me. But that doesn't happen a lot too. Some studies elsewhere, some plan to work elsewhere. Some don't belong to this country. And from time to time, they move on, and when they do, we have to move too. The direction we're heading would not so much be the same, perhaps someday we'll meet again. Perhaps we'll forget each other in time. Perhaps "moving on" has another meaning, it also means "letting go".

Obsession is a curse that I hope would never happen to you. But it does, when it does, it's bad. I've heard that the fastest way to get rid of an obsession is to get a new one. But when you can't find a new one, you learn to let go. It's the hardest part of growing up.

On an unrelated matter I got a B for Business Econs. So no mood to blog, New Year just started, take it easy la.....

Boom Boom Pow

2009-12-30T00:00:00.000+08:00

a fraction of my ex-schoolmates

This holiday of mine has been nothing short of refreshing. I managed to meet up with almost all my friends. Those previous schoolmates, previous churchmates, current churchmate and friends from other school I don't even remember how I met them. It marvels me for the fact that I have enough close acquaintances (not the ones like you add them as friend on facebook but don't even know who the heck are them) to fill up a truck but is still single (at the moment, I don't guarantee what'll happen at the next second) I heard there is a time for everything so I am neither rushing nor trying anything now. (I doubt this sentence and its' lack of originality)

Laksa taste as good to me as it was before. This is the one I had in the Spring Madam Tang. Apparently Madam Tang's laksa's quality differ from one place to another, now it is just the Spring's one that's good.

for a whopping Rm11.20

I've learn a great deal with this trip back. I guess you could know so with my previous post and my new blog. Anyway I'm not preaching during weekdays, I got a new dog. It barks at me.

And that is Kuching for me, I am impressed by the recent development of the city. Being stagnant on developement since Independence, the last 3 years has been like a gold rush. The rich gets richer and hopefully they will spare some crumbs for others.

In the next 3 years, I hope to see Kuching acheiving it's Garden City status. Making it truly the most livable city in Malaysia, a blend of modern advancement in nothing short of a laidback and easy town. You don't get beggars here, it's the very definition of a middle-class society.

And next week, I got to report back to Najib Tun Razak in the country's capital again. Apparently he couldn't manage the country properly when I merely took a short annual break. MCA collapsed, Military Jet engines got stolen and what more, let me see today's headline (Monday when I am writing this) erm, I see on the Star "Doctor fondle my private parts, says factory worker." Nevermind, blame that on the goverment too!

Oh yes, before I forgot.... HAPPY 2010, LIVE LONG AND PROSPER!

It's a New Year

2009-12-23T00:21:00.001+08:00

It has been a year now since I started blogging here. And I have grown throughout this year. Blogging for me is always good as long as it edifies me. Sometimes it come to you as a form of entertainment and I don't mind that. Unfortunately it seems to me that I have come to an end with this blog and I no longer feel that it can help me grow to the next level.

Like I said in my previous post, I am a Christian and with recent experiences in life. I now see to it that it is not possible for me to grow by avoiding God in my sharings. At the same time I do not want to impose on all forcefully my faith and my beliefs. After very little thought, I've decided to write another blog which is completely themed around Christianity. And I believe it to be equal if not more entertaining and meaningful than this nonsense I have here.

Yes I would maintain this blog and keep writing here. I will update both blogs once a week. Almost like real life, on the weekends I will attend church, and on weekdays I'll be at home (which is here) .

This is how I mean it when I say I do not blog for people. Even if I want to, not many people are interested to read this "very bad self-help book" that I am writing. It is good enough if you had done and be commited yourself to certain things and people for an amount of time. And when there is a need to change, you'll have to change and move on with life.

Oh yes, Christmas is around the clock, so here am I wishing all my friends and strangers a MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!

And yes, the whole point of this post, this is gonna screw a lot of religious minds and pretty much any Christian on the street in town. But I am sick of religous people and I like to screw them. I'll tell you why later in:

superstarpastor.blogspot.com

Directions

2009-12-19T19:52:00.009+08:00

Last night I had two glasses of Tea C Peng passed midnight and sure enough my caffeine sensitive body reacted to it accordingly. I couldn't sleep until dawn. There is something about lying in bed in a sleepless night, firstly it sucks. Secondly your mind would start to wander around, thinking about this and that. And when the morning arrived, you had to remind yourself that whatever crossed your mind last night wasn't right. It was just your hyped up brain thinking nonsense. And I have decided to share yet another one of mine with you.

I was thinking directions. Specifically the directions of my life. I wasn't sure where my life is leading me to. And I wasn't sure if I had done the right thing so far. Am I investing time on the right people. Should I continue what I am doing, should I spend more time with certain people that poses neither immediate nor long term effects in my life. I was thinking directions.

A person cannot live without knowing where they are heading in life. Even if you're heading to hell, you gotta at least know it. It is depressing to be aimless. Liken to a floating boat in the sea. And I just thought I didn't want to be one of them. It is part of human nature to feel insecure when you're in an environment or a time, an age of your life where you have to make decisions. Decisions that will affect your life significantly. I feel that I have to start with a direction. You got to at least know where you want to go before you can take the first step.

As a Christian who refuses to preach in his blog. You have to understand that whatever I write here is just half of what I believe in. I've asked many questions without giving the proper answers. All my posts read like a bad self-help book. But it's been more than a year now and I've gotten sick of myself. I've decided to take a step of faith, to mention more about my beliefs. When men have a problem God has an answer. It's just that sometimes we are too stupid to realize it.

And to directions? It is good that we seek our heart and pray, to understand what we really want. But yet our futile mind can sometime think so much and plan so far only. We can't go beyond God. We can't even be sure what's gonna happen tomorrow. So in that light, I've also learnt to surrender my cares to God. Believing in His provision to lead me into the path I so much seek. And I believe it will be a good because I believe in a good God.

I know me talking about my faith is a bad combination. I've tried to avoid it but it's such a big part of me recently it has just been growing I couldn't help. I don't have a talent I have a gift. It has been tested proven, and no one would deny that I can't if I say I can preach. I may not be a teacher that can reveal a lot of things to you. But I can warmth your heart up with a simple message. A message of love this Christmas. As much as humility is one of the virtue I build my life upon, denying the fact that I can perform doesn't help.

Jesus Christ is not a swear word. Tonight you are young and you might feel that with both your arms stretched wide across the air you can seemingly own the world. Well you wouldn't be forever young. Someday, you'd wake up wishing that you had learnt more about this Name you swore upon so frequently. You'd wish life is a little more than what you've owned. You'd think about the past and the time and opportunities that slipped right across you. There will be regrets, it will haunt you. But there isn't much you can do about the past. Have you instead given much thought about today? Any directions?

Politics is The Enviroment

2009-12-15T12:49:00.004+08:00

Last week, I had a long time friend over in KL for a night and we just spent a great deal of time talking about politics. Coincidentally his father runs for office and is the chairman of a certain party of a certain state. Rest be assured it is not the ruling party la. I thought it was just very nice to be able to discuss with a peer about the on-goings of this country. I do not get that a lot. Obviously politics is something people in general would care more as they grow older. Because politics is not a far-fetched business, it is the environment.

So what do I have to say about recent development in politics. Well, first of all, there aren't much recent developments. From what we know is the ruling government wins.

1)Let's talk about the Perak crisis. The last we know they overthrown the state govt. and then there were some protest. Then they changed the Parliament chairman, there were some chaos. Then the high court ruled that Zambry was not the legitimate Chief Minister, then the next day, that ruling is overthrown over by Zambry's appeal (most efficient court ever, able to handle appeal in 24 hours) and then now there is not much news.

2) Anwar's case, as ugly as it may seem. The trial is on. Regardless of the appeal to strike out the case, the hound to bring the case to a syariah court which needs a 4 witness to testimony before one can be proclaimed guilty for adultery. Or in this case, a little bit more than adultery. The trial is still on. And we have no idea how this will lead on. Maybe and it's just a speculation, he might go to jail again. You don't see any sense in this but base on the Malaysia Boleh theme, we can do crazy things.

3) Despite all the RPK accusations, all the Bala statutory declaration, no.1, no.2 and now he come back saying another story, involving more people. This thing is resting on stagnant waters. It is not going anywhere up till now. And no one seems to have sufficient power to nail it. It is not anybody's fault, it is just a difficult case.

4) Lingam case, not really crucial in the political scene, but I thought I'd just mention. A royal commision is useless. They have all the power to investigate but ZERO power to take action. It's just a game. This is how I play it. You got a problem with my friend, fine, to bring justice on the table, I'll get the royal commision. Let's come investigate, do it for 6 months, 1 year, not enough? Do it for 2 years. Sooner or later, the public will forget and then we will also pretend we forget. Nobody gets hurt. Investigation finish? So what. Nothing happens. No charges, nothing.

5) MCA problem. This one I can say a lot Haha, because MCA not powerful. They have like 3 groupies in 1 party trying to tear each other off. It kinda remind me of "Romance of the 3 Cities". Chinese people, really, memang like to fight against each other huh? But wait, this doesn't fit into the picture that the ruling govt. is winning, because the situation is bad. It is bad for them and I don't think the pubic would ever give much support to them in the next election.

6) PKFZ, one of the issue why MCA is fighting as the critics would speculate. The money is lost, the project has failed, we cannot recover it. That's all. The culprit? They will not be punished. Because our country has a better definition when it comes to the Free World and Democracy - Everybody runs free.

7) BTN course is a joke. I have not even heard of such thing until the news reported it. It is not ideal for the govt. to teach other races to hold on to the so called supremacy and instill hatered and rasicm. As a Chinese, let me tell you, if the Malay, Indian, Dayak, Black or Western people have any good qualities that I can learn from. I would go and learn from them quickly, not to hate them because they are better than me. From race to race, we may have differences and we may not be the best of friends. But at a certain level, surely we can see eye to eye and live peacefully liken to a family under the roof of this country. So why do govt. instill such courses? Do you think it is for the benefit of all races and promote unity? Do you think they care about it? Or was it politically motivated and for their own benefit? All Chinese, and all Malay and all Indian would agree with me. We got no problem with each other. We have a problem with those politicians ruling us because sometimes, they are just screwing us left right up and down.

8) The future of the political landscape of Malaysia, as I see it today is thorny, but getting better. It is definitely a progress, nomatter who is winning or who is losing. And it is important, very important, we keep on the good work. Bloggers keep on blogging, news site keep on reporting and out of our millions of population surely doors will be open to a few that can carry the weight of leading this country. If you don't make it leap as least try not to destroy it. A taxi driver told me that under the era of Mahathir, there were more progress than under Abdullah. I don't think a taxi driver is all that credible but if a driver can say it. It got to mean something.

If there is an opportunity for me to enter politics. Would I take it? I will. It's a 'if', don't quote me 10 years later and say what had happened to me. But I will, and I think everybody should think like that. Because politics is not a far-fetched business, it is the enviroment.

Nothing Much

2009-12-11T11:33:00.008+08:00

I woke up with an inspiration this morning. But then I continued lying in bed by the time I got up, it is gone. I'm going back to Kuching tomorrow. December is always great for me, just to meet up old friends and gather. I only get to see some of them at this time of the year. It's like seeing Santa Clause sometimes - only once a year. Not the real one, the real one never existed but the one in the shopping mall. That's the part of life that isn't really good. Not all your friends can stay near you all the time. They mostly don't.

I don't think I will call up Mr Alan up there to ask for young and beautiful girl. That's probably because I am not straight. (Pun Intended) I mean, my back is not straight. I always have a problem standing straight after getting used for years to the habit of hunchbacking a little while walking. Which is why I bought this 2 weeks ago.

It is actually painful to use this thing regularly. But I have to if I don't want to be huckleberryfinn. It is suppose to help me fix my posture.

I've recently joined the bandwagon of idiocracy (no such word, I invented it) by drinking this. No offense, detox tea are great. And tru detox have a good reputation of making your shit look like pasta.

But again, you can eat whatever health supplement you want. If you refuse to control your diet and eat anyhow, it wont be of any help. Except to make you feel better mentally. I have extensive experience of being fat and I have made good progress in bringing it down, so I can say it. It has been 3 months I am in university. I guess this is just the end of the beginning. I am looking forward to a good time in Kuching and hopefully next year (and I dread it) would be yet another challenge I can overcome. Peace out.

Pen down my thoughts

2009-12-07T01:04:00.002+08:00

I have been playing facebook a lot recently, a little too much actually. While cruising facebook, I actually angered a friend because of the things I wrote. Somehow my sarcastic jokes turnt out.......... really sarcastic to him. And so I made him mad. Another classic example of how I screw up things in life. So I am taking a break from facebook, these social networking sides are sometimes more real than life. People actually take what you say seriously and they treat it the same. Dangerous I would say if you're not careful with your words.

Let's put this aside. I think human relationship is just sometimes weird. Let's take boy-girl relationship for instance. When you're in love, everything seems so right and nice. Then 2 years later, somehow something goes wrong and then you break up. When that happens, all you can do is lie on bed and wonder what went wrong? And then you start to think of all the times you both had together, and wonder if it means anything now.

Which reminds me of what Shakespears wrote "the course of true love never did run smooth" in a midsummer night's dream. Yeah, but sometimes it just run into hell.

On the bright side, wait, there is no bright side.

All you feel is your world slowly collapsing, pressing you down making you hard to breath. You wont die eventually. No, you will survive. But it is damn sad and not fun. Which answers why most of the songs you heard are lovey dovey and poets enjoy writing love poems. Because human emotions are just very good to exploit. If you have 10 songs about friendship, world peace and family values in an album. The only people that will buy is you and your family.

So here is my little poetry:

You could live 1000 years and never would have thought,
Such shits would happen to you,
You thought you're grown up and mature,
You thought you're big enough to handle,
But shits would ultimately happen to you.

To say this life sucks is unfair,
Because everybody shits everyday,
Sometimes it goes down the toilet bowl,
Other times it goes down your throat raw,
So ultimately shits will happen to you.

So days will pass as tomorrows come,
And dreams unfold in pieces,
Some good some bad some pain in the ass,
But as time blows the leaves of memories,
Surely if thou shall endureth thy time with love and patience, hope remains faithful.

In a bowl of tomato soup.

Penang

2009-12-03T01:29:00.000+08:00

camera phone image is like that

My cousin drove me down to Penang at night last weekend. Penang is one city that looks fantastic from the bridge but when you go inside the town area, it kinda looks like Kuching. But definitely, being the no.2 city in Malaysia, it does have more buildings and a larger population.

We have heard a lot about Penang food. Actually they are not bad. Here's the Penang Cha Kueh Tiao, Har Mee, Chendul, Cheong Fun I've tasted.

I've got a problem with the Chendul. Considered I went to the so called most famous Chendul in Penang near Komtar, I didn't really think it was worth it at all. To begin with, I have to line up in a street like this:

And eat standing on the street. You should see how they washed the bowl and spoon. Just rinse it in a big container of brown murky water. It's perfectly the definition of reduce, reuse, recycle. And probably their secret ingredient. The taste is good, I have to say, but far from great lah. It's not even worth a second visit.

I went to Queensbay and all that, but then KL got enough shopping malls already. So nothing much. Oh ya, I ate this yam rice over in Butterworth. Kinda miss the soup with pork, tasted salty and vinegar sour. I happen to like sour things.

Top 10 Reasons My Blog Cannot Be Popular

2009-11-29T04:58:00.000+08:00

10) I am not vain, I simply cannot take 16 pictures of how I do boring stuffs and post it up. For example: HELLO GUYS! TODAY I DRANK MINERAL WATER FROM GIANT!

GIANT MINERAL WATER!

First you open the cap!

And then you swallow it like a blowjob! DELICIOUS!

Oh Trust me gentlemen, I feel like my IQ point had just dropped by two even to demonstrate that out.

9) I am not geeky or tech-savvy, the only high tech thing I've got is a laser mouse. So there is no way I can impart any knowledge to my readers regarding the lastest trend. By the way if you're still using optical. You are out-dated.

8) I don't have boobs and is very reluctant to show my boner. Because for people who has an average life like me, you have to either be gay or write, show something sexually explicit for people to even care.

7) I'd love to travel, but a student like me can't even make it to Timbaktuh with my allowance. Damn whoever that didn't make me the son of Lee Kah Sing. I qualify from looks to character to be a rich man's son that never have to work for money, eat, sleep, spend money, eat, sleep, spend money and die stupid. So no chance for a travel blog.

6) It's not very entertaining for everyone when I ask people to be thankful for their lives and how they should live it. It's only entertaining for me. So no good entertainment blog.

5) Anwar haven topple the government. No good and bloody politics recently to even talk about. MCA is a piece of cibai now. Even I hope they will solve their problems fast because they are confusing the public with their idiocracy.

4) There is nothing GLAMOROUS of what I am doing

3) A majority of the population still doesn't care about blogs. It's not me, it's the enviroment. Pick your side.

2) I have a life.

1) Because of more interesting websites like wide6.com (yes, it is what you think it is, so don't try)

Bonus Post

2009-11-26T22:33:00.004+08:00

Do you feel that sometimes Christianity to you is just a loose set of moral codes? Designed to keep you in line, and while you obeyed them casually you didn't pay much attention to it: You just did enough to make you feel good about yourself.

Do you wake up in the morning and pray routinely because it is what the church told you to do since young, but you never really mean it in the heart? Do you at times go to church camps or church events, where the music is so good, the worship is so great it “touched” your heart, and for a moment you are excited about God and Jesus but that feeling only last for a week, and then, you forget, and then you slowly and completely leave it behind.

If you have these experiences, you need to pick up the phone and call me. Because many churches ain’t telling you the real deal about Christianity, because many churches are keeping the truth and Jesus behind the curtain. They are not teaching you right. Church is not a law school where you go and learn what is right or wrong. Church is a place you meet Christ, and through His empowerment, love and grace, you change. This is a message from Andrew Ho, the last few people in this nation, that can really preach the hell out of you.

Super Christian Talk: If you are a preacher, you read this out loud to your congreation this Sunday and then you preach Jesus to them. If you can't show them the truth, pick up the phone and call me. I charge by hour.

Random Talks

2009-11-24T01:17:00.001+08:00

I have been writing on this blog for the past 11 months now. It has been over 100 posts consistently generated by my less than interesting life. Sometimes I wish I can write blog in seasons. You know, you get 1 season done. Then you get a long break, and then you come back to make season 2 again. Which is not a very bad idea. Because life is about seasons. It's about stages. If you wonder what does generation gap means, it simply means 2 people who are at different stages of life being unable to communicate effectively.

J.Co Yogurt is a great idea except it being Rm9.10

But again, if you think this is just another blog post that I'm gonna preach about life, you are wrong. I can't possibly do it all the time. Women, come once a month. I cannot come 6 times a month and still be normal. By the way, I am not implying that I am. And I feel that it is time for me to move on to the next stage of life. I know it is a little too early to make new year resolutions, but who are we kidding, most new year resolutions go down the drain. If you want something to be different, you make a move today.

I don't know, maybe I should take life more seriously. Maybe I should fall in love. Maybe I should change my attitude towards life and people (unlikely so, why lower my statures to be one of those lowly beings). Maybe I should rock the world of everyone I know and show them I am alive and kicking. There are a lot of maybes, most of them crap. But between dreams and reality, most people want to be a better person than what he really is when it comes to Christmas and New Year. It's more likely a futile attempt as they will repeat their same behaviour the following year. But there will be a few of us that can really do it.

It is believed that abalone resembles a certain body part

Which reminds me what Einstein said, insanity is to repeat the same action hoping for a different result.This is good isn't it, just me sitting here chit chatting with you randomly. Actually I am just talking to myself here. I don't even know who reads my blog and who doesn't now. This is a one way communication. With the help of facebook, blogs are really dying. It's actually more enjoying to play facebook than this. I mean, we can do most of the things on facebook more effectively than blogging. It's like a blogging tool made for lazy people.

Instead of typing long sentences to say something, you just have to update your facebook status that goes like "I AM SHAVING MY BALLS NOW". And the whole world gets it. You want to show where you've been today, just upload some photos and tag everyone. Events, great tool I used it to organise gatherings this coming Christmas. Just invite your friends on facebook and see if they are coming. And the comments, wonderful, you like something, just click "like". Way more encouraging than someone cursing you on your blog anonymously.

It's the young people thing today. Unrelatedly, I'm having this cough for a week now. It's 2 a.m. as I'm writing, so let's just consider this our pillow talk and say our goodnights.

P/S: The Christmas Carol is actually a good and meaningful show to watch. For those people who are more inclined towards English education, if you want to reminiscence your childhood Charles Dickens story, watch it. It makes Christmas better than 2012.

To Arthur!

2009-11-20T08:37:00.001+08:00

I don't drink a lot. I don't drink at all. Not even socially. I only drink when I am sad. It's a trick that I've recently learnt that drinking a little beer helps me relax. You don't get drunk, no, I don't get drunk with a can of beer. I never got drunk and I don't think I will. My point is, it's actually easier to sleep with a little alchohol when your heart is a little troubled. It makes your mind think slower and your heart numb. That's why I guess my dad drink a can (and a can of beer only) before he sleeps. You see, when you're married with the same women for the past 25 years....... ahhh , nevermind that.

It is true that drinking is not a solution to any problem. If it is, then psychologist and counsellor will be very sad because they will be out of job. But not every problem is solvable and technical. Not everything is a business decision. Some of the problems is just stupid. For example, you fall in love with a girl that doesn't like you and like someone else instead. Or you're gay and you fall in love with a guy that is straight and you're thinking what the hell is wrong with you. In short, emotional problems are more complicated and there usually is no solution to it, except for you wait for time to heal itself or........ TO ARTHUR!

Beer is like panadol, you don't use it to treat your problems. You just suppress it until it gets better. And believe it or not, this suppressing thing, it works for boys. Girls would love to crawl and hug each other in bed, talking and crying their hearts out while trying to come up with encouragements and solutions to their problems. Boys on the other hand drink and talk in analogies.

For example, a girl would say: I really love this boy, but he rejected me because I am 1 year olderrrrrrrrrr (insert high pitched voice and tears), now I just feel so stupid, why, why, whyyyyyyyyyyy did I fall for this kinda boy. Although he is really cuteeeeeeeee, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh (insert higher pitched voice and more tears)

Boys or in particularly me in similar situation would go: I did something stupid.......really really stupid. To Arthur! And all we need is a few friends that didn't care to be around, just so we can show how damn sad we are.

So which way is better? Of course the girl way is better, that's why they live longer. But will we change? Of course not, if everyone in the world would stop drinking, we will have enough rice to feed all the starving children in Africa. It's a big industry. We can't let it fall. But am I advocate drinking. No, I'm just lining up a social phenomena that neither of us can change. It's an observation base on facts that do no justice to anybody.

Welcome to the cruel cruel world

Crab

2009-11-16T06:11:00.005+08:00

Don't kill small crabs

Tmnet is a headache. And we all know that. To make a long story short,

I want to apply streamyx, apartment no phoneline,I applied phoneline,after got phoneline,they tell me no port,I wait for the port to be fixed,after port fixed,they tell me no modem,so I waited for the modem and then I found out that the modem got only one lan port which is not enough for my 4 people apartment........now I have to ask someone who can help me set up my D-link Modem.. Total waiting time, 2 WEEKS!

They say if you want many people to read your blog, all you have to do is to swear a lot. Like how Namewee diao TNB.

So streamyx cibai. But I have no choice but to subscribe to them because she is the monopoly. Other broadbands are still crap. They are either coverage not enough, got thereshold limit, slower or simply more expensive.

Talking about crap did you read the news of the "missing girl" who went to genting with her 15 year old boyfriend? Don't undermine this kind of news because these are the news that made it to "the star" most viewed. People like sensational news. In other words, I'd but Rm50 that they had sex in genting. Because we all like having sex in genting and 15 year old boys can dry hump a bolster for 30 minutes, what more the real thing. Hah, one of the regrets of my life is to never make headlines for this kinda thing.

I mean, who would report a news which says "Andrew, one of the boys that lived his life ordinarily and properly, watching occasional porn with minimal exposure, reject special service when go to massage but masturbate himself in private, never thought of paying for sex, retain dignity by retaining virginity until he finally lose it voluntarily and legally with someone hopefully is not a whore". This is the kind of news where the title would be "Top 10 losers of the year".

But really? Has our world demoralized itself to an extend whereby doing something right equals God damn you are a freaking loser? The truth is it has. But boy, if you've reach a certain stature called "The Andrew Ho standard of I don't care what the fuck you do as long as I don't fuck up my life like you do", you'll be glad you belong to the minority group of so called losers.

Don't regard me as a self-righteouss person who always repeat the same thing. Regard the enviroment and peer preasure a little bit too much to bear. In other words, imagine your 16 year old girl which is in love with me going to Genting for a week long holiday. I swear in the name of TMNet, 7 condoms will not be enough. And you would wish this society is a better place. You would wish the clubs doesn't sell pills, you would wish there aren't so many chinese prostitutes in Bukit Bintang.

By they why did I choose 16? That is the minimum age I will not be charge with statutory rape. That's the difference between men like us and the boys at large, we use our freaking brain even when we're horny. Education not wasted.

Do You Want To Titanic Me?

2009-11-12T03:37:00.000+08:00

Men want women to be fresh all the time. As long as he still thinks the woman is fresh, he will treat her like she is the only thing that matters on earth. But why is it that so often we hear girls say to their boyfriends "you have changed, you are no longer the guy that I first fall in love with". That's because somehow the boy thinks her girlfriend is not fresh anymore.

So the question is, how long does this "fresh" feeling last? Scientifically speaking, it is the first 3 days he know her.

That's why you will see men who keep finding new girlfriends, fresh girlfriends. Because lust is an unstoppable force. Women on the other hand is a little different. Instead of finding new fresh boys all the time, they want their boyfriend to remain fresh forever. It's a little bit like trying to make pickled cucumbers.

Do you know why titanic is the best love story of all time? Because Titanic is a place where you don't have to work but you get to eat. So in the morning you get up, you don't have to work and you get to eat, in the afternoon you don't have to work, you get to eat, and in the night, you don't have to work again and you get to be romantic. It does not absolutely resembles real life at all. And the most crucial part? It never lasted more than 3 days.

Please understand that the 3 days is very important, this 3 days is when the romantic turbo of a guy is turned on. He will be able to perform task and behavior that he will never able be able to repeat again for the rest of his life, to you. Drown in an icy cold ocean, towards a women you've barely known, what are the chances you will give her your only pelampung? The romantic turbo is still turned on.....

*Ideas for this post is not original, I plagiarise it from a funny show. And you should be aware that I write these things for fun only.

Cute In Many Degrees

2009-11-08T04:26:00.004+08:00

Morning Gentlemen,

I've just realized if you have recently fall out of love, winter sonata is one of the songs that can most probably inspire a suicide. So don't listen to it. I've been going through some rough patches lately, I became a little emotional as it is reflected in my writing. But I guess this will be the last mushy post in a while. Because life move on and people have to follow it.

You might be wondering what happened, but if you know me you'll know that I do not discuss about my personal feelings and stories very much. Never. Certain things are better kept in the heart, it is no big deal, it's just me being more of a man. A little bit too much sometimes.

The holidays are coming, I'll be back in Kuching for a brief 2 weeks towards the end of December. As I am writing to you I am also listening to a piano piece that sounds almost like a sad Christmas song. And all I can think of in my mind is that this Christmas, it will be wonderful if I could just get the chance to meet up all my friends. Those that I have not seen for a long time, a damn long time indeed and I want to tell them that I still remember them, and I still care. Just as I always will.

I want to do those good things before I get a little older. Wouldn't want to wait until my mid-life crisis come to finally realize what I've missed ^^

There are times indeed when we feel a little sentimental, but God I hope those times wouldn't be too long. As a boring writer that generates all his boring ideas from his empty mind, I can tell you, it doesn't feel so good. For every sentence you write that touches the heart of others, it must first touch yours.

To lighten up this post, I wanna visit the new gym in Kuching when I'm back though, I wonder if they would let non-members in at all. I guess they would at least let me in until the receptionist counter, it's worth a shot because when I look at the pictures from Kennysia's website, the receptionist looks kinda pretty. Just wanna make sure it isn't photoshoped. Hahahaha.....

I'm cute in many degrees. And I deserve a great life. That's what God told me and that's what I believe. So it does to you my dearly beloved friend, whoever you are. Here's a little flying kiss for you from the bottom of my heart.

He goes to gym, he thinks egg white is protein, he needs protein, so he ate all the white and left this aside

爱到太践还是算了吧

2009-11-04T08:29:00.002+08:00

人与人之间相处是一门艺术，它是一种感觉，也是一种感情。困难在那里呢？它就在当你看着心爱的人与别人做爱时，那个感受你如何承担？所以我们今天的主题是，当她与别人做爱时，我如何再跟她相处。我再次强调，相处是一门艺术，这是个很烂的开头。哈哈哈。。。

心痛是痛得很痛。算了也算不了多少。想忘在一时之间是不可能的。这种感觉你叫我如何处理? 他们说这种小爱小恨，迟早会过去，但迟早不是今天。迟早不是明晚，当迟早还没到来时，你叫我怎么死?

这世界是不负责任的，它是不公平，它是残忍的。不是有些人不求上进，是事实太多时候太难了。更何况犯践的你我本来就是喜欢自讨苦吃，怨不得别人。

结论呢？就是大家一起吃大便吧。

English Translation via Google Translate:

Among people is an art, it is a feeling, but also kind of feeling. The difficulty there? It's in when you watch a loved one when having sex with others, how do you feel that commitment? Therefore, today's theme is that when she was having sex with someone else, when, how do I get along with her. I stress once again that coexistence is an art, this is the beginning of Henlan. Ha ha ha. . .

Heartburn is the pain painful. Forget also the number of Suan Bule. Would like to forget in a while is impossible. This feeling you call me how to deal with? They say that this little love little hate, sooner or later will pass, but sooner or later, not today. Sooner or later, not tomorrow, when not coming sooner or later, you told me how to die?

This world is irresponsible, it is not fair, it is cruel. Not some people do not make progress, is a fact too often too difficult. What's more guilty of Jian's always been like you and I ask for it, nobody is to blame.

Conclusion? Is the bar stool to eat with everyone.

Not Important

2009-10-31T10:11:00.002+08:00

Welcome back to my low life gentlemen, things are settling down for me in KL. Of course, there is really nothing much to begin with. Not that I am studying in a whole new enviroment. Considering the amount of Indonesian people I mix with, I still feel little traped in between Bandung and Jakarta. Where the hell did all the Malaysian go?

It's really easy to ignore blogging when you have things going on in your life. Blogging is really not so important. It kinda reminds me of a stupid politician that once said "blogging is for women who have no jobs and has nothing to do". Well, to be fair, it is easier to blog when you have no job and have nothing to do. Unfortunate for me, I'm neither born into a wealthy family nor did i strike any jackpot recently. So I've got to study, I've got to work.

It's not really fair but knowing Indonesian friends also mean I know people from Acheh (two of them). And when you know their experiences in life, of which all their families were washed to the sea and never survived, I figured I shouldn't complain too much all the time. Maybe sometime I have too, why, because BN is still on the throne.

see the blue frogs

Anyone who read the news would know what happened in DUN Perak recently. The problem has lasted so long, now it's not so fun anymore even to joke about. They are like two footballs teams supporters, who go into the DUN and shout at each other. One claim they are legitimate, the other claim they are right. But of course, those who has eyes know exactly which team did the right thing.

What BN did was wrong in a way that they forego public perception and support. Discounted the future and focuses on only short term goal, which is to win the DUN back. This is a rookie mistake. Obviously if the goverment is thinking of hiring a better strategist, I'm one of the new blood most qualified in this country. They should have just given me a scholarship and make me the next Chua Soi Lek or Ong Kee Teat. Personally I like Chua Soi Lek more, he's as shameless as me. But of course, when I tried to enter the Prime Minister's residence to discuss about my scholarship, I was denied access. Maybe its because I am not Anwar's personal aide.

Short Form - MCA

The recent news also reported Pakatan Rakyat having internal struggles. If that's going to be a problem, I guess BN also nailed it by having the dramatic MCA fight. It's at best only a 1-1. The Star also went further by reporting a few posts that Anwar and Azmin having "special relationship". I do not see Malaysiakini covering that. It's disgusting no doubt whether it is true or not but I like how Anwar deal with it. The party did not respond at all to that piece of news. The way you kill a bad report is to never get into the game and play along, classic.

And that's all the nonsense I read on the news, which is disappointing. So until next time, good bye world.

Oh, here is Namewee latest video about TNB.

Thoughts

2009-10-27T01:16:00.005+08:00

Sometimes in life, people dissapoint us. They are not able to live up to our expectations. It can be a friend, a partner, a lover or just anyone else. It kinda hurt us in a way that there is nothing we can do about it. So the best thing ultimately is to let go and move on.

There are some things we cannot change, like people. No matter how hard you try or how much advises you give, no one changes anybody. What we did is just try. Why? Because it makes us feel better. At least we tried.

Have you ever care for someone who don't care about you? Or try to love someone who don't bother about your existence? Have you tried to do good things with good intentions but somehow turnt out quite badly? If you had, then we all have something in common.

What do you think makes me different from others? Nothing. And what do you think makes me feel that I'm better the rest? Nothing. So why do we even bother to compare?

It is possible to look down on successful people. But it is not possible to look down on humble people who don't bother about how successful you think you are.

I've done good things to people who don't really appreciate them. But it's okay because they told me they respect me this much. (a little bit)

No matter how hard you try, you can never teach a dog how to fly. So just let it go.

There are a few reason why we don't fit into a conversation. It can be a language barrier, a topic we don't like to talk about, or we're a christian that is stuck between a conversation of how to find the G-spot of your girlfriend and how to cheapen yourself and her by doing her over and over again like an animal. You think my language is too rough for you to take in? Well, maybe you don't fit into this conversation.

No matter how good we think we are, please understand that there will always be plenty of others who can do it better. So never feel too good or proud of what you've done. The only attitute that is acceptable to me is humility.

I don't enjoy hurting people's feeling. But I do enjoy seeing people getting punished for their own sins. I like to help people and I don't usually ask for anything in return. I just enjoy the feeling of helping people who can't help themselves.

It's very difficult to mingle around people with no moral standards, no religion, no beliefs, no values, no character, no principle, no ethics, no nothing. But why are these things important they ask? I don't know, I just figured those are the things that can differenciate me from the animal kingdom.

When I love you, I correct you. When I like you, I advise you. When I still care for you, I talk about it. When I give up on you, I keep quiet. And I always will.

Forgetting someone might be an impossible task. But Ignoring someone isn't.

Narcissism

2009-10-23T02:37:00.000+08:00

Iranian soup

If you ask me what's the meaning of self-obsessed. I would tell you that it's an attitude of some people who are brave enough to face reality. To fully accept the fact that sometimes it is hard to be humble when you're perfect in every way. For example, me.

So what does it takes to acheive such high level of self-obsession? Ignorance. If you would close your eyes for one minute and learn how to ignore. This world will seem so much better to everyone of us, isn't it?

Iranian Lamb

Who cares if I am fat, who cares if I am a loser, who cares if others think I am ugly or if I walk into an Iranian restaurant and ordered a dish that looks like shit?

If you think that is meat, you are so wrong. It is eggplant, smashed into mushy mud and I'm suppose to eat it with bread. Which ultimately looks like this.

This is the story of my life

You see sometimes, self obsession is good. Because that's literally the only way most people can look into the mirror every morning and think they are the most beautiful people in the world. And there is nothing wrong with that. Nomatter how ugly you are, nomatter how horrible your body is, please understand that there are a lot of ugly people in the world like you too. Except for me. So embrace your ugliness today and know that you can be proud of your ugly face.

Iranian Kebab

Hahahahahahahaha. Sometimes its just nice to screw people with nonsense. I apologize if I hurt your feelings. Don't believe in anything I say. I'm just kidding. There is no way you can look in the mirror every morning and think you are the most beautiful people in the world. You are not me. It's physically impossible.

Wake Up

2009-10-19T01:16:00.004+08:00

The hardest part about waking up every morning is when you know that there is nothing interesting today, there is nothing to look foward now, there is no motivation to move on, yet somehow you summon the energy there is to get up from bed and act like this is going to be the best day of your life.

This is why I keep reminding myself every morning, that no matter how difficult it is or how dark my mind may perceive this day, this week, this month, this year is going to be. I have to wake up. And I have to wake up good.

If today is gonna be a bad day, it is not going to change with me not waking up, hiding in the room avoiding the sun in a gloom and doom. If this week is gonna be a bad week, it is not going to change with my worries and my complains about how unfortunate and pathetic my life is. If this year is gonna be challenging, it is not going to be less burdenful if I refuse to get up, wake up, and fight against it with the little bit that I can.

So wake up. Because change will come and is made by a small group of people, who believe if they persisted, if they insisted, they will light up their day, and they will light up their lives. It is not easy, it is easy the first day, it is easy the first week, but to do it forever. It's not just a change in your attitute, it is a change to how you think, it is a change to everything. Haven you heard the quote from Oprah that says "if you want your life to be more rewarding, you have to change how you think"?

So wake up before the sun rises up to the noonsky, because the day starts early. And your life starts there.

There are two parts to my secret of which this is the only one I am sharing. Because if I'd tell you part 2, you will call me religious and ask me to stop preaching. But be sure, this is better than nothing and way above par from what any motivational speakers can tell you. The difference between me and motivational speakers is that they study motivation and teach them to you. Me? I generate them from my mind and share it genuinely from my heart. I don't read books, I don't trust them. The theories of the world only serve to reconfirm my opinions and further justify my righteousness. SO WAKE UPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!

Run fatboy, run!

2009-10-16T15:36:00.004+08:00

Ever since I started attending University, I've been attending gym more religiously then I attend church. Maybe it's because of the influence from my crazy indonesian friends that is obssesed with gyming. Or maybe it's because I finally decide to live up to the full potential that I am. Which in short can be described in a versatile english word call -------- awesome. Or, fat.

This is one of the few examples of my crazy friends

For me it's just fun to play in the gym. It makes me feel healthy. Doesn't matter if it's just an illusion, it's still worth it.

Which is why when I read about Kenny Sia opening a new gym in Kuching. I was actually very delighted. Because as we know, Kuching don't really have a proper gym. You cannot put two threadmills and two dumbells in a room and call it a gym. Neither can you make a big stadium call Rakan Muda and fill it up with rusty steels and broken equipment and say it's a gym.

I think it's just a great idea, if I were in Kuching I would definitely visit the place. Unless it's super expensive. But I don't know the rates so I cannot comment on it. My guess is that it will be relevant enough for working adults. I would have drop Kenny an email to take a sneek peak of the place and blog about it if I were in Kuching.

Kuching needs it. If I had enough capital, I would open one. Like how I always fancy about opening a gelato stall in Kuching. Because Kuching desperately needs gelato. Anyone who has enough money and you are reading this, open a gelato stall and sell it at Rm6.90. I like that number, I don't know why.

But I think this will work out well http://www.kennysia.com/archives/2009/10/my-secret-proje.php I think lah.

About You & I

2009-10-15T01:28:00.001+08:00

In the city when you gaze upon the sky at night you will find no stars. But just because you don't see them doesn't mean they stop existing. The same goes in life, I've met many people in my walk of life, many who had gathered around me and many who had left to other places. I don't get to see them around anymore, no, not so much like I used to. But just because I don't see them doesn't mean they stop exisiting. I miss some of them, and sometimes I wonder if they miss me too.

If you wake up early in the morning, just right before the sun comes up, you'll get to hear the sound of birds chirping. And you'll get to breath the morning air. The freshest of the day. And I'd wish at that moment in time, that I could just say a big good morning to everyone I had known. I bet they would all return me my greeting with the most genuine smile. The ones you can only get when someone really loves you. As a person, as a friend or as a family.

So tonight before you sleep, take a moment to think about life. Your love ones, your friends, and all the nice people you remember. Because as you think about them, they might be thinking about you too. That's how we connect. That's how we love and that's how we give a little more warmth to this big cold world.

Ice Cream Car

2009-10-11T01:15:00.009+08:00

Super Short Talk: KNNCCB, I bet Rm1 on Chua Soi Lek will lose in the EGM. Who knows Ong Kee Tat, Chua Soi Lek both lost until need to take off underwear. This is the case when you are in the casino playing "big or small", and then all the 3 dices turnt out to be the same number, so the dealer wins all nomatter what you bet! KNNCCB.

My apologies for the lack of interesting updates recently. If my full time job is blogging, you bet I'd come up with more jokes than this. But unfortunately the money I get from this blog can hardly cover anything. So this is when reality sets in. Talking about jokes, I bet we've all know about the kiss ass 1malaysia F1 team. You hear me right, I said kiss ass, not kick ass.

Looks Like ICE CREAM

Don't get me wrong, I totally support the Malaysia F1 team. It's a good project. Mainly because it doesn't involve anyone's income tax. Unlike the stupid 200 million ringgit space tourist we sent to International Space Station. This is much better. I mean, I don't even remember what's the name of the male model we sent up the space. And I don't know what stupid experiment he conducted up there, with what sorts of results. I bet most people don't know too! You know why? Because it is freaking not important. Here's the deal, you buy over-priced jet planes from Russia, they let you ride the rocket to space for fun. That's like me paying 200K for a Toyota Vios, but on top of that, I get to drive a Mercedez for 1 day. I think Malaysia has once redefined stupidity in our own special way.

I am so cuteeeee

Back to the F1 Team. I said it is a kiss ass team because of the name lah! It is definitely stupid. Private corporate needs government support when they do things. I guess the decorative trade here is to name the team over one of the most rubbishes idea I've ever heard. 1Malaysia, as if there were two Malaysias before. They might as well name it over me. You judge, which is better, The Malaysia 1Malaysia F1 Team or The Malaysia Andrew Ho F1 Team. Even the acronym sounds better M1M F1 Team VS MAH F1 Team. But of course, I don't have an inch of stature to make anyone name anything after me. To top that up, I don't even get to go into a famous University.

Fujian University, short form F.U.

Which brings us to this year Times top ranking University. University Malaya top 180. Hahahaha. I applied law in UM. They rejected me. Bad choice, but still, it's the reality. I think that's why they changed the chancellor with a 1 day notice last time. I weep for you and your children. I heard the new vice chancellor is forcing all the lecturers to come up with 2 research papers each year so to top up the ranking. And besides stupid locals, stupid international student can now join UM because one of the criteria to top ranking is of course getting more international students. Even Indian Institute of Technology Delhi lost to UM. Those people build rocket also lose to UM. See how credible is the survey. I think if you let them do a survey on Malaysian blog, I sure top 100. Anyway UKM, USM dropped in the list. So much for the apex university status. One of the criteria for Apex University status is to improve the ranking to Top 200 in 5 years, top 100 beefore 2020. Fuck you la, what you aspire to acheive in 5 years, UM already acheived now, If you let me choose, I'd rather burn all the money invested on them in front of KLCC. I think that would make us famous faster. After all, how the goverment manage Malaysia has always seemed like a marketing gimmick to me. Tallest building, longest bridge, tallest tower, biggest roti canai, world's best airport, proton cars. Check the projects, all got problem one.

And back to politics. Bagan Pinang by-election. It's funny that BN send a man name Isa to contest. His name is like an acrononym to Internal Security Act. What is wrong with them? Still, I hope they lose. Papers say it's their stronghold and all that. But gentlemen, let us pray that a miracle might happen. In trying times like this, we desperately need such things to cheer us up. If you ask me why do I hate the goverment? I'd have to ask you back WHY DO YOU HATE MANCHESTER UNITED?

Super Update: Okay fine, so Isa won. Money Politics man bah, of course he wins.

Real Mature

2009-10-07T01:31:00.005+08:00

At every point of life, I try my best to be the better man. The one who meets the expectation of those around me. Unfortunate for the world, in all attempts that I've tried, I failed them terribly. Why? Because contrary to popular beliefs, I am actually human like you. Believe it.

It's always easy to criticize. Life is like a huge stage, while every audience can criticise the performers on stage, most of them can't even perform one bit. To be fair, they paid for the tickets to watch the show. But in life, no one pays to see us, they just hit us all along the road.

The hardest part to accept these criticism is, sometimes they are true. If a rapist accuse another rapist of rape, is he correct? Yes he is, but is he qualified to point that out? Again, by law, yes he is and he should. But does the whole scenario sounds fair or right? Not really.

So how do we deal with social situations as such, when an idiot calls us idiots because we really are idiots. I've tried different approaches to find the best way to handle this, I can scold them back, reason it out, forget it, cut contact. But the best way really, is merely to accept it.

Does that mean we lose? Yes. We lose. We lose our dignity, we lose our face, we lose the right to get angry at people for whatever reason. But instead of focusing what we lose, there are actually gains out of it. We gain a friend, we avoided an argument, if we change, we gain respect and ultimately we become better people.

I know this is a lot to take in, and I know it's even harder to perform. But this is the part of growing up that I've learnt recently. For most of the time in the past, I am priviledge to have older friends and brothers around to accomodate to my crap. This time around, I have to accomodate others. And that my friend is real mature.

My Updates

2009-10-03T00:05:00.002+08:00

When every picture of you looks bad, publish someone else’s photo instead.

This is Aris, my University buddy, hostel mate, house mate, church mate, whatever mate

My life is okay here, everything is still working out relatively fine. I have two group of friends to hang out with. One being my old time and all time Kuching kakis and the other being my Indonesians group that somehow dominated Malaysia private education in a subtle way. Statistic says we currently have 1.8 million Indonesian students and workers in Malaysia. That’s 1 in every 24 of us. It’s more than enough to qualify as one of the minority group here. But of course, we will discriminate you. And it’s fair, because I belong to the second largest group in Malaysia, and I am still “like that what”.

And oh, I haven got the time to find other friends and cousins in KL, but you bet I will.

I am still going to church. Ironically I go to church even more regularly than I was in Kuching, which is not my initial plan at all. At first I thought of skipping church for a while and play. But that didn’t happen so well, I started attending an Indonesian Church from my second week. And it’s kind of good. It work out for me pretty well I’ll tell you why. All my Christian friends would know that I am very particular with the sermon preached, you preach bullshit to me, I’ll give you a bullshit face. But this, this is perfect for me. I would go to this church and enjoy the worship (which is good), and when it comes to sermon, I can just sit down and chill because if I don’t listen carefully, I wouldn’t understand what the preacher is saying. And I don’t even need to because I’m the only Malaysian there!

If you can't drink beer, drink something else that looks like it

Anyway I’m visiting another local church this week because a hot chick invited me to. It’s a sin to turn that down so I will have to make some sacrifices. Also by the way, I have not yet found any pretty Malaysian girl of whom I may devour in this place. Economy is very bad in this competitive market.

Moving on, my midterm and finals are coming. So I will be keeping myself busy. And yeah, I’m losing weight here. I think lah……

I Crush You

2009-09-29T00:09:00.000+08:00

If I could rename "love at first sight", I would call it crushes. But of course I couldn't do that. It's like when people try to flirt in the movies, they say "If I can rearrange the alphabet, I'll put "U" and "I" together". Yeah right, like they can rearrange the alphabet.

But if I may for once be a love guru, I'd say the problem with crushes are that they often come too fast and leave too soon. Leaving you wondering what's wrong with the world, you, him, her and everyone else.

Some things last for a long time. Others have a shorter lifespan. But the fact that they will someday end always brings us a sad moment. Sometimes we're sad for a day, sometimes longer. But even sadness expires when people move on. Which brings us to a technical question that is, if I know that the sadness I feel today will soon go away in a month, isn't what I feel now very superficial?

It may be. But it's not always the case. Because we didn't intend for crushes to happen. Most of the time, it just crashes on us. Very quickly.

The essence of writing a profound statement is to mix truth, emotions and plenty of erroneous personal opinions.

Why I am not afraid of the government

2009-09-25T10:29:00.003+08:00

I am still intrigued a little when people think that what I write on my blog can possibly lead me to harms way by the government. Obviously this world has over-estimated my capabilities in so many ways. Which is a common and understandable but not excusable mistake. But will I ever get caught by what I write in my blog? No. Why? Because I know what I am writing and again, really what I write and what I think is not so important to the government.

Rule no.1, I do not touch sensitive issues. Never. If I talk about race, all I will ever say is to promote unity. Because I am not racist. Even when my race is not treated with all fairness here, still, all I promote is unity and love when it comes to races. I may criticize government policies, I do not hurt other races. Because they too are human and I show respect to that. Rule no.2, I proudly accept Bahasa Malaysia as the official language of our country. Even when I have dispute between the language used in the teaching of science and maths, I never say we should not use Bahasa Malaysia as the national official language. Rule no.3, I shall never in my life insult others' religion. Even if they do not share the same religion as I am, I set my boundaries clear cut. Rule no.4, I do not insult the royals. Even if the news has lots of scandals and gossips for me to make fun of, I don't think they are so interesting. Rule no.5, I do not make up stories and slam people baselessly. What I say is merely a repetitive of news, facts, truth with the addition of my own opinions and jokes into them.

If I say Chua Soi Lek is an adulterer? Am I wrong? Can I be charged? Didn't the Star already published that many times over? If I say Ong Kee Tiat is alleged to have received 10 million ringgit from Tiong King Kong, am I wrong? Didn't all major newspaper already publish it? If I say don't vote for Barisan Nasional? Am I wrong? Can't I have an opinion about the government and decide which team I want to support? Yeah, but then can I express that view on my blog? Why not? I do not have a lot of faith in Barisan Nasional, but I don't think they are interested to jail me yet because of my opinion. They are crazy in many ways, but not to this extend to block every citizen's constitutional right for the freedom of expression. Please don't regard me so highly. I am like God, but still I'm not really God. I'm just like you and my penis is not even long.

When you read news portal like malaysiakini, malaysiainsider and 1000 more local political blogs. You will find so many more serious bloggers and journalist which are 10 times more critical than I can ever be. Me, I'm just a jester. I'm not a blogging virgin. This blog is 1 year old, my previous blog was 2 years old. I also took a 18 months break in between the two blogs to grow up. I can't say I'm mature now, since life is literally an endless learning process, but yes, I have an idea of what I am doing. SO NO! YOU WONT SEE ME ON HEADLINES ANYTIME SOON GOING TO KAMUNTING DETENTION CENTRE!

Way back in 2007

But on top of that, I want to encourage people to write, to speak, to sing. I want to encourage people to express themselves. I want to tell the world that it is okay to say what you think is right. With all due responsibility. Because if we remain silent, we lose. If we speak up we tried. And if we persist, we win.

The Accepted Social Convention

2009-09-21T00:23:00.002+08:00

In the process of growing up, you are likely to meet people who are smarter than you. You are also likely to meet people who are less smarter than you. Of course there are also people who are less smarter than you who thinks he is smarter than you and people who are smarter than you and look down on you at the same time. To counter with these social situations, I've come up with a formula that is,

"When a person is smart, he is obligated to tolerate others' lack of intelligence and forgive them. However when he is not so smart, all he has to do is shut up."

Believe it or not, if the society had applied my unfounded social ideas, more people would have become friends.

I respect people by these principles. Firstly I respect them for seniority. Whenever someone is significantly older than me, whether they can offer me sound opinions or not, I still have to show them a little respect for their experience and the fact that they had lived longer. But that respect is sub-standard. Secondly, I respect people for their wisdom or achievements. These are the people that really talk sense into your ears and their opinions and judgement matters. As you might have understood, I am one of those people that don't really care about the "2 cents worth opinions" of the general population. And I think the quote is stupid in itself.

If somebody regard their opinions as "2 cents worth", why do they even bother to express it to others? You might as well keep it in your diary, journal or your blog. Because throwing 2 cents around at people's face is socially unacceptable. 20 dollars on the other hand is great for me. Here is the top ten list of the types of people whom I find very distasteful:

10) People who are not sure what they are saying, but still keeps on talking.

9) People who are smart, and is trying to impress upon you how smart they are.

8) People who talks everything base solely on their own perspective and position, unable to put themselves in others' shoes.

7) People who keeps talking and never listen.

6) People who think they are funny when nobody is laughing at their jokes.

5) People that insist on their idealogies and opinions disregarding others'.

4) No heart, no emotions, no feelings, no understanding.

3) Agressive people who want to express themselves to the fullest extend everytime without practising restrains. Even if they are right, they look very wrong.

2) People who talks to you like you know nothing and they know everything.

1) Chinese who support Barisan Nasional!

Reading that, you might not agree that you have fallen on one of those listed. But I'm sure you have the same opinion that these people are annoying at times. How do I know? Maybe I might just be one of them.

Except for no.1, I am critical about that! Roarr.....

I am sad for Malaysia

2009-09-16T21:08:00.021+08:00

Super Short Talk: Coincidentally, this drama happened to me on Malaysia Day 916

I was in the Cheras Pasar Malam tonight when my father called suddenly. I thought it was weird that he call at such a time because I have just called him in the morning. Upon receiving the call, here is what he said: “I heard from people that you have been writing politics in your blog, about MACC and MCA and all that…..” and he then gave me a stern warning to take it all down, because he was afraid that somehow I might get caught or thrown down the building because of my blog.

I know who was the person that spoke those things to my father, but if you are reading this, let me tell you something. My name is Andrew Ho, if you have a problem, you come to me face to face and I will show you what the Bible means by “The Wrath of God”. You can take it as a joke, but you know what I mean here. Your action which seemingly to you is harmless has caused me 2 hours of distress. I was very enraged.

I am sad for you. I have been writing my blog for a year now and everyone who reads know that I am socio-political. If you want me to delete posts regarding politics I have written, you might as well shave my balls. But even more than that, I was sad for Malaysia. Which brings us to today’s word – cowardice.

Have we Malaysian degraded ourselves to such a level, whereby we are afraid to speak up even the slightest? Have we degraded ourselves so low, that we fear to go against the powers that govern us? Without questioning? Without scrutinizing, without care? Do you really love Malaysia? Or are we just a bunch of rats that live in this country but never treat it as our own? I despise you if you are such a person. I look down on you with all my heart, mind and soul. There is no level lower of which I will regard a person than one like that. Mark my words Malaysians. Mark my words, I am sad for people like that.

How can I shut up, when my fellow Malaysian are persecuted, thrown down the building in a mysterious death. How can I shut up when my country is labeled internationally as corrupted and unjust. How can I as an educated Malaysian who love my country stand silent in this chaos? If I am truly one, then my education is wasted. If I am truly one, then my life is not worth living.

Please understand that I do not go out and slam politicians with lies or defame them baselessly. Whatever I write would be peanuts compared to what Malaysiakini had done. If someone is going to get sued or arrested. I think it will not be me. I don’t think I will have that kind of privilege. But to shut up? You undermine my character. Too much and too low.

This is cowardice. This is why we fail in every aspect to achieve political maturity.

For the peace of my father's mind, I have removed my previous post about MCA, the one with my favourite politician Ong Kee Tat and Chua Joi Lek. I do that for 2 reasons. Because I know my father loves me and he cares for me. Although his concern might appear silly, sometimes a man has to make petty sacrifices for the greater good. The big picture you'd call. But having said that, I stand and I remain right in what I wrote, jokes and comments alike. This is Andrew Ho, the few kids among the malaysian population who cares enough to speak while others care enough to listen.

Bonus Post

2009-09-13T01:21:00.006+08:00

If this is not hillarious, I don't know what is. If you like it, watch all 3 parts. I am only pasting one of them here as to how my friend puts it, sharing is caring =)

8 years since 9/11

2009-09-12T00:13:00.004+08:00

Super Short Talk: I hope Chua Soi Lek win in the fight in MCA,I enjoy seeing that party split into two. They are liken to a group of neutered dogs barking at the moon.

I must have been too young then to appreciate this disaster when it happened. Which again prove me right when I say "life is too short to drink cheap wine". I mean, you can live up to 1000 years old. And all this still wouldn't make any sense to you. In the most unfathomable way 3000 people were killed in this disaster. Who on earth would have thought that one day, when you go to work in your office. A plane will crash into the building and kill you. And it's a twin tower somemore, if you are in the tower which didn't get crash first, you would go like "oh my god, a plane crash into the tower opposite". And while you're glad it didn't happen to the tower you're in, suddenly another plane came by and crashed on your tower. And when that happened the people in the other tower would go "oh my god, a plane crashed into the other tower too!" And while the people in the lower levels or the upper levels of that tower were giving thanks the plane didn't crash directly into their offices, next the whole building collapsed and everybody died. And everyone at the other tower which haven collapse panic and went crazy. Are you following me?

We are living in an insane world. If I had blog 8 years ago, I would have mentioned this. And the guy who fell down from the building in that video clip, it's crazy enough for me. It's like throwing a lizard down from KLCC. It drops like a jelly and follows with a thud.

Some say this recovered 9/11 picture is fake, but you get the idea

Of course when disaster like that happens, people are sad. Even people from far away would feel a little sadness for those who had to live that experience. Talk about life, talk about meanings. The only thing I get from events like these is that life is too short to drink cheap wine. Better not wait till tomorrow to enjoy life if you can afford one today. Because this is a mad mad world. Talk about fairness to all, some people die of hiccups while others have plane crash into their office in the mornings. It is so bad it's hillarious.

I think every new day is a gift from God and we ought to live it like we know it is precious.

My Updates

2009-09-08T00:16:00.017+08:00

I started attending University 2 weeks ago. When I touched down in KL, I took a taxi right up to my hostel at a whopping Rm120, which is ridiculous as normal price would be around Rm70-Rm80 at most. So I asked the operator and she told me that taxi price has increased. It is logical NOT. Anyway, the riddle was answered when I got the ticket, it said "Package: Premier". Only then had I realised that I did not specify that I want to take a budget taxi instead of the more expensive premier ones. And of course when I don't specify, most people would tend to over estimate my capabilities which I believe is wholly influenced by my exotic good looks that surpasses a major population of this earth and beyond. The end result? I was driven up to my hostel in a black Nissan. I was pretty sure some heads turned around when I got down the car. Talking about reaching in style. It isn't worth it but things like these do happen when we travel. Live and learn.

The real thing does not look that good at all

It's funny to note that my faculty has so many international students I feel like a foreign student more than they do. Indonesian Chinese are lots here but they are nice people. So yeah I'm still adapting to it. My area is relatively comfortable and I got a few ex-schoolmates in the same Uni. So I guess I'd do fine. Geared up to study though. Can't wait to learn something new and score some good grades. Bless me.

I spent my first weekend in Cameron Highlands with some of my Kuching friends. It's was kinda crazy to head up there on my first weekend.

Sticks out my turtle head

Cameron has always been the same though. But I got to say, the best corn in Malaysia is definitely there.

Visited the pasar malam

Rum and Stout Ice Cream which is exceptionally

good....

Overpriced Steamboat which I didn't pay for...

Went to agro places

with ridiculous green vegetables...

And make very girly post among them

So yeah, this is a little of my updates. Hopefully someday it will be worth reminiscing.

The Crap of Writing

2009-09-04T00:58:00.004+08:00

The ability to write is a real gift, it is one of the few ways that can really get a message across other than yelling at somebody's face at the top of our lungs. The best part of writing is that it gives people the option whether to read what you have to say or not. Unlike "talking" which transmit voices through sound waves, people can't avoid it. Do you realize we can close our eyes, shut out mouth, stop breathing but we can never really close our ears up? That's why people have arguments and hate each other, we cannot close our ears up and they cannot shut their mouths up.

But I understand that writing, much like reading takes a lot of patience. You can't rush it. It's not like hitting nails with a hammer. Sometimes in order to write the good piece of work you expect yourself to, you need time. In performing arts, sometimes the more you learn how to relax and let go, the more you advance. Like solving a complicated question, you have to be at peace before you can come up with a solution.

The art of writing has been taught, learnt, practised, studied for centuries. Eventually people got so bored about it today they are replaced by ipods. Nevertheless the practice of writing serves everyone in good purposes. Should I have something to say in my span of time, may I say it worthily like the great writers of all time.

Unfortunately, like physics which see no significant contribution since 1930, literature meets the same fate. We live in a time so special, so different from the past. A time where Internet is a global phenomenon and porn is easily accessible. A time where people are so advance they think they are a result of evolution and their ancestral roots traced back to apes. The greatest flaw I see in the theory of evolution is that apes can turn itself into human that talks while fish keeps swimming, birds keep chirping and dogs keep barking. How arrogant. My dog should be able to breathe fire if she were a result of evolution for 40 million years.

My point is, and its pretty hard to decipher from my previous paragraph, people don't appreciate writing so much anymore. Look at us Malaysians, we don't even read, what more write. Clearly writing is the higher end of civilisation where we have not yet grasp the importance of. In short, we are not a very bright nation. Repent! This is the crap of writing.

Genius is 99% crap and 1% luck.

Merdeka Special

2009-08-31T00:00:00.011+08:00

Super Short Talk: I am definitely missing my church and the people inside when I am not in Kuching. I am truly humbled by their input in my life. Thanks to you all in Sib Grace .

Convert this bill and I am worth Rm350

I love Malaysia. I love this multi-cultural country. I love the fact that we are different and yet manage to live together in chaos. I love the Chinese who triumphed under unfairness and discrimination. I love the Malay who take up all the quotas and opportunities to education, business and civil service. I love the Indians, who at most is only 10% of the population yet never give up to fight for themselves. Malaysia is truly a great place to learn how to give and take.

I may not like the system this country is running on. And I shall hate and despise Barisan Nasional for all the days of my life. But nevertheless I love this country. Not because it is good but because I am good. And from this day fourth, let people remember me, as the noble who set aside his political differences to write something good about his country. For this reason, minstrels will write songs about me as history remembers my name.

You may not delight in what I write, but it is alright because I don't care about your opinion. I forgive you. And whoever you are, I want you to know that this step I've taken is a big step , a big step indeed. It is not easy for one like me to love this country, genuinely.

with love from Andrew Ho,

a second class citizen in his own country

You want a Merdeka Day Celebration? I watched this clip of Sir Paul Mccartney singing on the Marquee of The Late Show with David Lettermen recently. And I thought it was a really good one. Paul Mccartney is the remaining 2 living Beatles from the band "The Beatles" of course and is a living legend. He's like The Jonas Brothers in year 2050. Just 10 times bigger! Happy Merdeka!

CSI Malaysia

2009-08-27T00:10:00.008+08:00

Super Short Talk: I strictly do not condone the use of foul language and vulgarity in real life. I believe life does not need to go that low. But for humour sake, I use it on Barisan Nasional because I cannot find other more suitable words in my vocabulary. This is CSI Malaysia.

Malaysian Fucktologist: I think Teoh Beng Hock might have commited suicide.

Andrew Ho: Why you think so?

Malaysian Fucktologist: I don't know, I feel like that lah.

Andrew Ho: Do you have evidence to suggest your theory?

Malaysian Fucktologist: No.

Andrew Ho: Do you think you are God?

Malaysian Fucktologist: No.

Andrew Ho: Then clearly what you feel is bullshit. Do you like to eat cibai?

Malaysian Fucktologist: Sometimes yes.

Andrew Ho: I see, after this inquest, I will have to proceed with charging you for contempt of court.

Malaysian Fucktologist: But why?

Andrew Ho: Because your face look like cibai, you theory sounds like cibai, and I don't like man which are associated with cibai.

Malaysian Fucktologist: Like that also can?

Andrew Ho: If I can pull Sivakumar out of the parliament, I can sodomize you in public. (Turn to the judge) My lord, I have a problem.

Judge: What is your problem?

Andrew Ho: I feel the temperature in this room is too cold, can your honour please ask someone to turn the air conditioner down?

Judge: You have to be specific.

Andrew Ho: 24 degrees Celsius.

Judge: Alright.

Andrew Ho: Mr fucktologist, you said Teoh Beng Hock could have commited suicide. Have you interviewed his family members?

Malaysian Fucktologist: Yes, 3 of them.

Andrew Ho: How is Teoh Beng Hock's physiological background.

Malaysian Fucktologist: He does not smoke, drink and was not sick, he was not on any medication or drugs.

Andrew Ho: Do you know he was engaged, and was going to get married?

Malaysian Fucktologist: Yes.

Andrew Ho: If Teoh Beng Hock had jumped for suicide, there should be shoe prints at the window, is that correct?

Malaysian Fucktologist: It is possible.

Andrew Ho: But there were no shoe prints.

Malaysian Fucktologist: He walked on carpet and maybe there was no dust sufficient to leave shoe prints.

Andrew Ho: But Inspector Malik said on the star "http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2009/8/13/nation/20090813090300&sec=nation" that the place is dusty, he checked, and if someone set foot there, there must be shoe prints left behind.

Malaysian Fucktologist: Okay.

Andrew Ho: You didn't expect me to remember the url didn't you?

Malaysian Fucktologist: No, I didn't expect you to be crazy.

Andrew Ho: Can you tell us about Teoh Beng Hock's shoe?

Malaysian Fucktologist: It flew far away from the body.

Andrew: How far?

Malaysian Fucktologist: I don't know, I didn't measure.

Andrew Ho: Why didn't you?

Malaysian Fucktologist: I expected the police to do so.

Andrew Ho: I also expected my girlfriend to give me a blowjob. She turnt out to be Chrisitian and refuse to engage in pre-marital carnal intercourse with me.

Malaysian Fucktologist: I am sorry, I don't think this information is relevant to this case.

Andrew Ho: Do you think you are God?

Malaysian Fucktologist: No

Andrew Ho: Then clearly what you think is not important. Teoh Beng Hock's shoe was found far away from his body, is there a possibility that someone had dragged him to the window, left his one shoe behind, throw him down the building and then throw the shoe down again?

Malaysian Fucktologist: There is a possibility.

Andrew Ho: Did you check if the shoe had fingerprints?

Malaysian Fucktologist: No.

Andrew Ho: Why not?

Malaysian Fucktologist: I expected the police to to do so.

Andrew Ho: Of course, you expected. Everything that is important you expect the police to do so. And the police probably expected you to do so back. And before anybody started to do anything, all the evidence are ruined.

Andrew Ho: When Teoh Beng Hock fell, his right leg faces the ground. Can I assume that the leg must have suffered fatal injury?

Malaysian Fucktologist: Yes.

Andrew Ho: But no it is not. As I watched the stupid animation from ntv7, it was his head, face, and buttocks which was fatally injured.

Malaysian Fucktologist: The buttocks might be injuries due to the fall.

Andrew Ho: But it can also be injuries due to beating by a blunt wooden object.

Malaysian Fucktologist: It is possible.

Andrew Ho: Why is it that when there are 2 sides of the story, you are always pro towards the idea that Teoh Beng Hock commited suicide and not murdered? Are you trying to cover up?

Malaysian Fucktologist: No, I am not trying to cover up.

Andrew Ho: You took an oath Mr Fucktologist.

Malaysian Fucktologist: I am ready to go to hell.

Andrew Ho: I didn't say you are not. Do you know how to kill a person with a ball point pen?

Malaysian Fucktologist: No.

Andrew Ho: Take out the pen and stab him in the right eye.

Malaysian Fucktologist: I don't think that knowledge is relevant.

Andrew Ho: I am just trying to illustrate how easy it is to kill a person without leaving evidence. And also my theory which goes like this. MACC had beaten up Teoh Beng Hock back and front before his death. They did so in order to force him to be a false witness to accuse the opposition party wrongly. This is coherent with Najib's desperate will to crack down and win back Selangor's state government. There goes his facial injury and the buttocks injury. And in the midst of the beating, someone accidentally knocked up his head too heavily, causing him to die. There goes his head injury. Then to cover up his death, they simply dragged him to the window and throw him out the building followed by the one shoe that was leftover during the drag. But of course, that is just my theory.

(Turn to the judge) And I believe my lord you will go with the theory that Teoh Beng Hock commited suicide although there is no evidence to suggest that?

Judge: What makes you think so?

Andrew Ho: Lingam sent me.

Judge: Of course, whatever you say.

Andrew Ho: Muahahahahahahaha

THE END

Be Proud, Be Very Proud of Your Goverment

*This is a work of fiction, at the time written, only 10 days of inquest has been held and only this much jokes can be made. Of course, as the inquest progressed, new information will be revealed but still I stand by my judgement that no justice will be done whatsoever.

Top 10 Stupid Ideas From Barisan Nasional

2009-08-23T00:13:00.002+08:00

10. School girls get raped because their uniform too sexy, they should be punished!

9. Batu Gajah tiap tiap bulan pun bocor!

8. Women should get permission from their family before they go travelling. This is to prevent them from getting cheated into drug trafficking.

7. Cina adalah pendatang asing!

6. Saiful came to my house to apply for a scholarship. And also to tell me that Anwar felt up his ass.

5. To help cope with financial crisis, maybe we pay you half-month salary every two weeks. So every month you can get your 1 MONTH SALARY!

4. Khir Toyo's mansion is 24 million? Nevermind la. Pakatan MP misused Rm2000? What the fuck!? CATCH HIM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ROAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!

3. I do not know that mongolian women.

2. Saya bersumpah, Anwar letak dia punya kuku masuk lubang saya, neh belakang sini, saya show you. (Repeat the clip again and again in Permatang Pauh by-election and lost big time)

1. ONE MALAYSIA! PEOPLE FIRST! PERFORMANCE NOW! ROOOOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR! I do not know that mongolian woman.

On top of that, I just feel very obligated as a Malaysian who loves my country, to paste these videos up. For justice, for rage for whatsoever. People need to be aware and we cannot remain ignorant forever. Politics is not a game, it is a measurement, of the extend of how screwed your life is. I said this once I will say it again, men who don't know politics is a shame. It takes a profound level of ignorance for someone to not care about their own country, to know how it is run and what is happening to it. And FYI, Anwar is my herooooo!

Much Ado About Nothing

2009-08-19T00:30:00.007+08:00

Super short talk: As the ongoing politics show and tell, Tiong, a Barisan MP felt that he has been conned by MCA when he rented Rm1 hostel units to Tar College as a symbolic gesture in support of MCA (Tar College is a subsidiary of MCA). As I was reading Malaysiakini, a reader of them pointed out a funny question. "Azman Zainuddin asked: Did MCA paid the RM1 rent?"

Tabuan's Thompson Corner sells one of the besk laksa in town, opens in morning only.

Of all fat noodles, Udon is my favourite selection

It's pathetic so few stalls sell good chee cheong fun in Kuching

Dried Bak Kut Teh in Kuching SUCKS!

I had this on Najib's birthday for watever reason

And I believe Chinese is indeed the best cook in the world. For if it wasn't because of us, pizza wouldn't have existed. Legend has it that:

"Marco Polo missed green onion pancakes (Chinese Dish) so much that when he was back in Italy (From China), he tried to find chefs willing to make the pancake for him. One day, he managed to meet a chef from Naples at a friend's dinner party and persuaded him to try recreating the dish. After half a day without success, Marco Polo suggested the filling be put at the top rather than inside the dough. The change, by chance, created a dish praised by everyone at the party. The chefs returned to Naples and improvised by adding cheese and other ingredients and formed today's pizza"

But of course it is a legend. Which I believe in bias because I am Chinese. Kuching green onion pancake looks like this,

Pizza version 1.0

Anyway Kuching is set to embrace yet another round of dry spell. It's an irony that the wettest city in Malaysia faces haze and water shortage. I wish you all well in this season, be blessed.

Bonus Post

2009-08-16T23:01:00.006+08:00

Girl Fight @ Kuching Festival

Fighters: 3 Ah Lians

Kung Fu used: The Fighting Girl Cat stance a.ka. 猫爪功

Reason: Who cares, it's a girl fight

Pause & Ponder

2009-08-13T04:30:00.010+08:00

I have been watching so many movies and sitcoms recently, it kinda bored me out already. The thing about movies is you'll never finish watching them all. So I'm going to slow down things a bit as the holiday season of my life is coming to an end. I guess it is time for me to put on my thinking cap and move on with the next chapter of my life.

I really wanted to post up something fun for this post. But then again, as I entertain you, I bored myself. What's the point of having a blog when nobody reads it? But more importantly, what's the point of having a blog when you write only for others and not yourself?

Do you know how I know this is not a perfect world? In a perfect world, I would be prince and you'd be my princess. And we'll both live in our castle at lala land. =D

No, I don't have something particularly thought provoking today. Neither have I great inspiring ideas. If I can cook up something so serious and intense all the time, I would have vomit blood and died long ago.

Today I just feel like having a chat with you. Like those random chats we have with friends. It doesn't have to be meaningful or with a reason. Sometimes people just talk.

When one door closes, many more opens. I live life by chapters and seasons. When one ends, the other begins. The only thing I could ever hope for is to live every one of them to its fullest. So that one day when I look back, I would say "yeah, I have lived my life".

If you are a person that like sitting on a cool park bench and just ponder about things. Or you like taking long walks in the evening just to chill with the breeze. Then we have something in common. We appreciate life. And have absolutely more than one side. =D

Today I pause and I ponder.

Lemons & Lemonades

2009-08-09T00:54:00.002+08:00

Sometimes in life I turn my head around and envy some of the people around me, especially peers who has notably higher achievement than I do. Those whom I think had a better life, who had better opportunities, who are more capable or intelligent. I don't really get jealous, it's more like an admiration in a subtle way.

And for always I have never asked myself or wondered if there are others who think the same way about me. Well I guess maybe not, I've got nothing to be envied of. You must be thinking I have a very low self-esteem. Well let's just say that ship has sailed. Let me put it this way, the last time Satan dropped by to collect my soul, I gave him my self-confidence, self-esteem and dignity instead. I figured those are the things that are pretty useless in life and I don't need it.

A man should speak up straight and stand upright when he knows he is doing the right thing. Irregardless of the opinions and judgement of the crowd. Logic, truth and rationale should come first before emotions. That to me is confidence. Self-esteem is not what others think about you. It is how you wake up in the morning and look yourself in the mirror. Dignity is not how much respect I've garnered from people, it is how much I have given. It is how many times I realized I have been wrong and apologize. It is how many times I know others have wronged me and how I forgive.

Big words like these are not self-explanatory. Even the dictionary doesn't elaborate it to you. And we can spend a lifetime wondering what they really are. I for one let Satan picked it away from me. Confidence, dignity and such as are not things you can keep in your pocket like a key or a wallet. Neither can it be boosted up with material things with let's take for example an expensive cellphone. You suddenly take an HTC cum Apple cum Blackberry out, and your confidence level raises up because you know you are using a cool gadget. That is cheap confidence. Because anyone else can pick up an iphone or better things. But not everyone can speak up straight and stand upright to do what he perceive is right, for what he believes is true.

So what's the deal about me saying I don't need to keep confidence with me. Is it just some kind of witty expression? Now this is logic, the only real power I have, the rest are my imaginations. If you my baby, let the abstract confidence that you think exist in your mind shape up your action, you are weak. And there will be many things you can't do. You will find yourself with a lot of phobias. You will find yourself with a lot of limitations because there will always be a still small voice speaking to you in the head saying "you are not good enough, you are embarrassing yourself, you don't have enough confidence". And that is not good. The only way to be truly confident is to set aside the whole idea of confidence itself and let action dictates.

However life is too short to think about confidence, self-esteem or how big your balls are. The world is not all about competition. Who is the winner or who is the loser. It's about life. When life give you lemons, you make lemonade. Why turn your head around and envy again? Hahaha....

"I won't be labeled as average" -- Rachel Joy

2009-08-05T00:36:00.000+08:00

Super Short Talk: I wrote this post before Teoh Beng Hock died, so this explains the frequent dead people posts, it pretty much make my blog some sort of a tribunal for dead people already.

Every now and then, you know I like to talk about dead people who died unfortunately. I figured I have by far showed too little gratitude for the life that I have. And I need to constantly remind myself. Not that I have a great life to begin with, it's just well, better than the shit life some people have. Today I just thought I want to share with you about a girl call Rachel Joy Scott.

In one of the deadliest school shooting in US history, Rachel Joy Scott was the first victim. She was 17 years old when she were shot multiple shoots to death. Her funeral was televised and the ratings scored higher than Princess Diana's.

On one fine day, her life was taken away. Just like that, there weren't any warnings or a last word. Even criminals and soldiers had better treatment, they get to make a last phone call. She however did not. She was shot while having lunch on a lawn outside school library. She did not have a blog then, but she left behind six diaries and several essays about her belief in God and how she wanted to change the world through small acts of kindness. Shortly before her death, she wrote an essay for school stating, “I have this theory that if one person can go out of their way to show compassion then it will start a chain reaction of the same.

If there is one thing I know about life, I know it has always been a chain reaction. And every action has a reaction, very much like what Newton's third law says about mechanics If the crazy shooter didn't shoot her on that fateful day, she wouldn't have died and I wouldn't write about her today. And she wouldn't be such an inspiration to many others. It's been 10 years since she's dead. But in this world, nobody really dies, they are just merely forgotten. Some easier to forget while others lived on.

And umm, lastly, I really don't like this part of my composition, I don't want to give people the impression that Christians are fanatics. But sometimes shit happens. And I can't possibly downplay that.

"I am not going to apologize for speaking the name of Jesus . . . If I have to sacrifice everything . . . I will." –Rachel Scott

"The Columbine tragedy in April 1999 pierced the heart of our country. We later learned that the teenage killers specifically targeted Rachel Scott and mocked her Christian faith on their chilling, homemade videotapes. Rachel Scott died for her faith. Now her parents talk about Rachel's life and how they have found meaning in their daughter's martyrdom in the aftermath of the school shooting. Rachel's Tears comes from a heartfelt need to celebrate this young girl's life, to work through the grief and the questions of a nation, and to comfort those who have been touched by violence in our schools today. Using excerpts and drawings from Rachel's own journals, her parents offer a spiritual perspective on the Columbine tragedy and provide a vision of hope for preventing youth violence across the nation."

语言论

2009-08-01T07:58:00.009+08:00

Super Short Talk: Can you freaking believe the news? Another state assemblymen from Penang died! Another by-election! It is the 8th by-election already! This is freaking hell. Is one of the strategy from Pakatan Rakyat fielding candidates that are going to die soon? Because you know what? That's a good idea! Like I said, it's bloody politics season 2! So let the bloodbath begins!

我鲜少用华文写文章，应为身边有太多人太傻太天真了，没法学会华文，有的连英语也只是半桶水。语言实为沟通之桥梁，没办法掌握语言，便永远无法掌握上乘精良的沟通技巧。有言说不出，有语表不了。丛然有万般智慧感想，拿彩的永远不是你。

当然，这世界不见得一切都要公平，如果每个人都那莫利害，那又有谁来吃大便呢？大便总要有人吃的。我的语言好，英语，华语，马来语，样样精通，但最喜爱的还是英语华语这两个国际语言。我并非马来人，不觉得自己有责任维护和发展马来语。更何况，马来文这个语文，实在是太过下乘，太过不全面了。不适合贵族运用,in other words, not suitable for the nobles. 怎麽了？我这样说，你不爽吧？

都跟你说了，这世界不见得一切都要公平，我自己爽就行了嘛。记得第一次喜欢文学的时候是由华文开始。华文的结构是一字一词的，和英语不同，我喜欢华文的干净利落，写起诗词来不沲泥带水。当然英语也有它的长处优势，其独特的地方。有阅一山不能藏二虎，只不过是说说罢了。马来人之所以无法超越我们，其中就是因为我们懂得他们的语言，而他们一点都不了解我们。有了语言，就有多一份了解。

人没有一生挥不去的惨情, 也没天生高一般的生命. 文章写到这里, 我也已忘了自己到底要说些什麽。都说了,这世界不见得一切都要公平, 也不见得一切都要合理, 爽就好了嘛，算了吧！

For those that do not understand Chinese, don't panic! Although I do not have the heart to translate this passage personally, I've used "google translate" to help me do the job. Here is what "google" thinks what I wrote!

"I rarely write in Chinese, should be around too many people too naive too simple-minded, can not learn to Chinese, English and some even just half a bucket of water. Language is a bridge for communication, no way to master the language, it will never be able to have superior communication skills. Could not have made, it can not form words. However, there are extremely intellectual Cong feelings never get the color you are.

Of course, not everything in this world must be fair, if everyone Nanaimo interest, then who is going to eat this stool? Stool was always eating. My language, and English, Mandarin, Malay, everything good, but the most favorite Chinese and English the international language of these two. I am not Malay, do not feel the responsibility of the maintenance and development of Malay. Moreover, the Malay language, it is too下乘, not too comprehensive. Not suitable for the use of Jazz, in other words, not suitable for the nobles. How the Mo? I think that a bad mood, right?

Related to you, and everything in this world is not necessarily fair, I have them cool on the list. I remember the first time like literature started by the Chinese. The structure of the Chinese language is the word the word, and English are different, I like the clear-cut language, writing from poetry to non-water沲mud. Of course, English also has its strengths, its unique place. Possession of one mountain can not have access to two tigers, only paying lip service. The reason why the Malays can not go beyond us, which is because we know their language, and they do not understand us. With language, there is more than an understanding.

Did not get rid of the miserable life situation, nor the high-born to life in general. The article written here, I have forgotten to say in the end its more什莫. Say that everything in this world is not necessarily fair, but also not everything has to be reasonable, like the Shuang do, forget it!"

Fishing Virgin

2009-07-28T00:49:00.002+08:00

Super Short Talk: I am feeling a bit disappointed to miss an offshore fishing trip on this 25 August. I am to leave for studies on the 26. Damn it.

This was how I look like when I was one.

This is how I look like 20 years later

This is how a piece of beef salami looks like on a piece of bread

And that is how I have just wasted 5 seconds of your life which you'll never get back. Showing you 3 pictures that resemble the same thing ------ BEEF! Hahaha, anyway....

I would like to extend a special thanks to Samuel, a new church friend of mine, who gave me my first fishing experience whatsoever last week. It was very courteous of him to bring me along. Especially when I neither know anything about fishing nor have any fishing equipments, which by the way don't come cheap and can be easily spoiled by first timer.

I was kinda expecting fishing to be real boring the day before and I didn't expect to catch anything, at least that's what I thought until I saw Sam casted the hook far out into the pond with a swing.

I just thought that was really cool. I've always have this genuine love towards swinging stuff, throwing stuff and shooting stuff. So yeah, if you got any sports that involve that, invite me. Shooting absolutely has the high priority. However, it didn't work out that well when I tried casting on my own, my hook kinda end up entangled on a tree.

But still my rod got 5 strikes and I managed to reel back 3 fishes out of them, the other 2 ran away. Apparently, they could not see eye to eye to a human-fish relationship that involve me feeding you the bait and you getting caught by me. What can I say, it's really fun when you catch something.

Considering my fishing mates around who caught practically nothing, it might have been my lucky day. Or perhaps I am greatly blessed by God who sees my effort in turning down all the girls who chose to offer me their bodies as a sacrificial worship to my charm. Or maybe, I'm just saying maybe, all the fishes just turnt suicidal when they saw my stupid face. But anyway....

Nahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, I'm just kidding, we let all the fishes back to the pond.

Top Ten Signs you are Middle-Class

2009-07-25T01:33:00.001+08:00

10. Your motto is reduce, reuse and recycle

9. You don't like to spend money for whatever reasons

8. You don't like donating to charity because you think you are the person that really needs it

7. You hate Bill Gates and you don't know why

6. You buy Borneo Post instead of New Strait Times

5. You haven been flying MAS since Air Asia was founded

4. You only shop during 'MALAYSIA'S MEGA SALE IS BACK!'

3. You go to form 6

2. When it comes to buying a new car, the only brands you can think of is 'Proton and 'Perodua'.

1. You are actually checking yourself with those signs listed here!

Bloody Politics

2009-07-21T02:09:00.018+08:00

Super Update: This post has been super updated.

Since when did Malaysian politics become so bloody? Ever since Anwar was released, we have seen 8 by elections in 18 months, which some of the assemblymen died to make way, which also by the way never happened in history with such frequency. And then we have Anwar the Sodomite trial for the second time, Perak the Zombie Trial, and a few cibai street protest, cibai ISA arrest which leads to many cibai civil unrest. This has been a hell of a political season.

But of course, I have covered all those news that I see interesting and thought I should take a break from the usual boring politics while waiting for Anwar to be arrested and jailed again. But suddenly, the news reported that someone from PKR decided to jump down (or maybe thrown down) from the MACC building. MACC is also known as the Malaysian Agency of Corrupted Cops. The dead guy is an aide of a PKR Assemblymen, he was arrested to help investigate a case against the opposition and was only released after questioning at 3.45 A.M in the middle of the night! Soon after, he was found dead near the same building, apparently like he jumped off from it. But is it?

My first reaction was "Wah Cibai!". What's wrong with MACC?

Did they just watch Wong Jing's "I Corrupt All Cops" and then decided to pull off a stunt like that?

You know what, our politics is like an English drama series and this is like an "end of the season spin-off". It's like this, in an English drama series, usually there is 1 theme in a season with a few sub-plots, and the whole season revolves around it. For example, our theme for this season is "How Barisan lost all the by elections" with the sub-plots "Unrest in Perak, ISA and The Fall of Abdullah Badawi". But we the writers are very smart one, as this season comes to an end and it looks like our ratings is still good. Before the last episode we've already started building the next theme of our coming season.

And this time, our theme is "The rise of Najib", "Anwar the sodomite trial take 2" and of course for the last scene of our last episode for this season. We just decide we'll kill a character from the opposition and throw him down the MACC (okaylah, it's the Malaysian Anti Corruption Commission) building, giving the audience a "What the fuck is that effect". And that is a really powerful one.

Imagine a 30 year old young man, who is supposed to get married in 2 days time, suddenly he was invited into the MACC building to help out with an investigation, and in a flash, his body was found dead. What happened? Is this a conspiracy? If it is, whose is it? For more, catch the next season of "Malaysia's Bloody Politics", only at Ntv7, your feel good channel.

yeah, I know, the corresponding actor name is ridiculous

Valkyrie is a very good movie I've watched. It's a true story about the Germans, the Nazis and a failed attempt to assasinate Adolf Hitler. I like it very much. And this is a NICE parody I've found which SPREAD BARISAN'S CIBAI AND PUSH A HYUNDAI INTO IT!

BARISAN FOR MANY YEARS OF GOVERNING HAS A SMEARED IMAGE WITH CORRUPTION, AND MACC DID NOT BOTHER TO DIG THEM UP, EVEN WITH THE MANY RECENT ALLEGATIONS. BIG ONES THAT INVOLVES MILLIONS AND MILLIONS OF RINGGIT. BUT THEY WITH ALL THEIR INTELLECT CHOSE INSTEAD TO RACK UP THE OPPOSITION FOR MINOR CASES THAT INVOLVES EITHER A FEW COWS OR IN THIS CASE, A FEW THOUSAND RINGGIT. WHICH DIRECTLY OR INDIRECTLY CAUSED THIS TRAGEDY. WHO THE FUCK BOTHER TO RISK GOING TO JAIL BECAUSE OF RM2OOO. WE ARE NOT TALKING ABOUT BEGGARS & ROBBERS HERE, THESE ARE ASSEMBLYMEN, UNLIKE SUPPORTERS OF BN, THEY HAVE CLEARLY BEEN TO SCHOOL. AND PROBABLY EARN MORE MONEY IN A MONTH THAN THAT! I CAN CERTAINLY UNDERSTAND WHY, THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE ARE OUTRAGED AND DECIDE TO THRONG OUT THE STREETS TO PROTEST. BECAUSE SOME EDUCATED PEOPLE THAT HAS GUTS, JUST DECIDE THEY WOULDN'T LIKE TO BE RAPED LIKE THIS.

The First 30 Minutes

2009-07-17T03:59:00.000+08:00

Some days we oversleep our hours and wake up with the freshest mind ever. And for the first 30 minutes or so, that is when we know our mind can think most logically, most analytically and most emotionless. It is that short period of time when I can see things as it is, nothing less nothing more, you could have played a porn in front of me and all I could see is science in action. But that moment could last no longer than half an hour, as time slips, I know the human part of me is slowly creeping in. And soon, emotions will cloud my judgement, hormonal change will affect my thoughts, there will be mood swings and temptations, and I will have to succumb to them all.

I am writing to you after a 15 hours sleep. You know you've overslept your day when you wake up with cold hands and feet on a sunny afternoon. I do not have a message to convey, this is not an Alien E.T. stunt, trying to communicate with you. This is the part of life when you know you have to seize the moment. And to remember your thoughts now and trust in them in the future, because you don't get this all the time. It is in one of these days when I woke up and realized I needed God. And that has changed my life. And for the other times of usual days, the best state of my human mind can think of is to masturbate once more.

The science we see today is a product of thoughts, wisdom, experience, studies that has been passed down cumulatively over a long time. But revelation comes like a lightning. It happens fast and doesn't strike at the same place twice. Most of them aren't written in books, even if they are, they are always subjective. That's why I never read philosophies, I could have written the same thing they did and receive little honour in return. It is in one of these days when I woke up and chose to believe in nothing else than the Bible. If someone has the right to teach me how to live my life, He better be someone much higher than I or the rest of you, like God.

There is a trend of how my mind thinks when I wake up like this. But I cannot write on now, my time is up.

Normal Post

2009-07-13T04:04:00.003+08:00

Because I am a loser, I only take pictures with a camera phone wherever I go. Although digital camera is now very affordable, the thought of bringing a bulky gadget everywhere I go only to take pictures is just too girly and hasty for me. I think most boys would agree with me, all things are better made simple. Compromising quality, a camera phone is a good thing at the very best of convenience, especially when you like blogging or you just enjoy snapping pictures. Anything better, you'd have to implant a camera into your body. I would personally like to put it in my penis, I just thought it will be hillarious when I go "hey hey would anyone like to take a picture, wait, just let me take my penis out and.... okay, anyone want a picture? Anyone?"

I have been using my previous Sony Ericsson K750i for the past 2.5 years. Though it was arguably one of the best camera phone like 3 years ago, it is definitely losing out in comparison with the newer models. So I've decided to buy a new one last month, and of course, like all my purchases, it has to go in line with my character, cheap.

So I went to the shops around Kuching, at first looking for a Samsung or an LG, but little did I know, all the shops here do not sell AP sets for these 2 brands. AP sets (unauthorised distribution sets) are usually Rm300 cheaper than Zitron's (authorised distribution, 3 years warranty one). So I've decided to get a Sony Ericsson C510 instead.

It costs me Rm600. Good, cheap and practical. I think jobless students don't need a 2.4 K Blackberry. And like it or not, most students are jobless and most people are mediocre. I know, it's quite an unfortunate fact of life.

My aunty was the Chief Prefect for Kuching High School in 1980. What is your aunty?

Most of my peers has left Kuching to study this month. Except for a few sick bastards that are going to cool places like NUS, US and Cambridge where intakes start later. While me, I'm just chilling in Kuching waiting for my Cha Kueh Tiao stall to ready.

I went for steamboat with a few of my friends shortly before they left. Frankly I don't quite enjoy this kind of sizzling steamboat. Half the time, I am busy frying stuff and eating off possibly uncooked meat while sweating through the night. It isn't very enjoyable.

Also I ate this in a new place call "Kimbay" in Kuching. The picture may look pretty, but it sure taste like shit. I wouldn't recommend anything from that shop.

Oh by the way, I found piggy bun in Kuching. My current pastor told me there is a place call Mitsu Teahouse in RH Plaza that sells it. I know it's Tau Sar pau only, but it's cute lah.

For Rm3, you'll have to compromise with the craftmanship

Cacat pig

Normal Char Siew Pau

Normal Pork Rice

And my normal face

Yalah yalah, still fat lah, what to do?

I asked my life to be extraordinary, it turned out normal. What to do?

I know Michael Jackson is dead, some fans very sad. I know the the government has revert teaching of Science and Maths in English. Some people very pissed. I know life sucks, Malaysia sucks, South East Asia sucks, Asia sucks, the world sucks, but what to do? No choice what, just close your eyes and live on loh. Or else go jump river meh. Suan le lah.......

No I am not going to Kelantan!

Your Sins Are Forgiven, Go And Puke

2009-07-09T02:10:00.005+08:00

Super Update: Miss Singapore's suggestive picture, like that also need to strip off her crown? Umm.....yeah, go ahead, I do like to see unfortunate things happen to pretty people.

Super Short Talk: This is a personal post

I rarely hold grudges on people for a long time, not even if they do something really stupid. Because me, like the great Britain who once colonized the world by the reason to spread civilisation, felt that we being the smarter ones have the responsibility to help those mentally challenged. But there is one man that made it on my chart, whom I was angry for many years. I was so mad at him, at some point of time, I don't even know why I am mad at him at the first place. So let's put our hands and welcome Mr Cheli Tamilselvam.

Since half of 2009 has come and gone. I figured that it is time again I do a mental sound check to see if I am still functioning properly. It's a simple process which involve isolating myself to an area and think hard. See if there's anything I went wrong and if there's anything I should fix in my life. Of course there are a few things I probably can't fix at the meanwhile, that I quarantine them in my vault. And today I've decided to take Mr Cheli out of my vault and fix it.

I was 12 years old when my brother was diagnose with kidney failure. Because of his condition, kind people from the church came and help and that was how I came to know Christ. I first know Mr Cheli as a good man, at least for that period of time, I still called him Pastor. 10 months after I attended church regularly, Mr Cheli wanted to start a youth ministry in Kuching. First of its kind, and he named it Bethany. I first stepped foot into that place on the 1 of May 2002. An easy date to remember. I was among the first batch of young people there, pioneers we would call ourselves.

At that time also, at home, I had been listening to sermons and tapes of the always popular Pastor Joseph Prince. During that time, Pastor Joseph Prince was more of a controversial figure in Kuching and also Singapore itself, where he host his church of 19000 members. The churches of Kuching then, with its unfounded wisdom very much repelled him and his teachings. Some calling it an occult. Because I was listening a lot from him then, his sermon were so good I got a little excited and I started sharing what I heard with other church members. Little did I know, at that instance I had myself planted a fucking time bomb that fucking exploded over my head which leads to 7 years of bitterness that lasted until today. I swear on my mother's grave and my father's grave and my own grave and my children's grave, if I am telling you even a fraction of a lie of how I felt, the anger in me, let the earth opens up and swallow me down any time.

Because of some doctrinal disagreements, In September 2002, me and a few of my friends were brought into a room for serious counselling. It was a Sunday and I was 13 and a half years old. You know, a traumatize patient will never really know how traumatized they were until they got out of it. Every time I thought of that moment, I get so emotional, I would have shout at anyone who say a word in his defence, my brother be my witness. The impact had gotten worst as I remember vividly, that my family were going under a lot of stress at that time, because my brother were in KL when I was counselled. He was not on a vacation, he was in the hospital seeking for treatment. How can someone be as insensitive as that, treated a 13 year old boy like that in such a difficult time for him and his family. I do not understand. When you are little, words from adults count a great deal to you, we don't see them as just mere words, we mind them very much. You say something crazy to a young boy, he goes crazy with it. Any sane person would have left the church (actually one did, a friend of mine who was 18 then) at such circumstance. But I was too young to think properly. I stayed on, and that was just the beginning of a 4 year ride I took in that church.

But an interesting question lies, was I wrong to listen to sermons from Pastor Joseph Prince at the first place? An excerpt from wikipedia says:

In 2006, Prince was invited to speak at the Grace & Favour Seminar, at Hillsong Church in Sydney and also to Hillsong London to preach at its three Sunday services. In 2007 and 2008 he was invited to speak at the Hillsong Conference in Sydney held in July and the Hillsong Europe Conference in London held in October. He has also been invited to preach at churches in countries such as Canada, Norway, Netherlands, South Africa and Indonesia. Video clips of his preaching sessions are available on the Youtube website.

He has a publishing house, and releases books, CDs and DVDs, which are sold at the affiliated Rock Gifts & Books Centre, at secular bookshops such as the Times bookstores and the Harris/Popular bookstores in Singapore, Barnes and Noble in the United States, as well as through Amazon.com. His latest book, Destined to Reign: The Secret to Effortless Success, Wholeness and Victorious Living, released in Singapore on 15 July 2007, contains teachings from his last ten years of preaching. The same book was released in the US in October 2007 by Christian publisher, Harrison House. Six months after its distribution in the US, it was listed on Christian Retailing Top 100 Books.

Hillsong is a big name in the Christian World, it is like Brad Pitt or Tom Cruise. Less be assured, not just any Tom Dick and Ramasamy can walk into their grounds and preach. But that is in 2006. I was in 2002. For crying out loud's sake, even MPH Kuching sells books and DVDs of Joseph Prince today. It comes to show I have an acquired taste for things and value them even before they achieve world wide recognition.

So 4 years I did my time there, until I finally came to my senses at 16 years old. A legitimate age to have consensual sex in Malaysia (yeah, you didn't know that? Neither did I when I was 16). I finally left the church, but the bitterness I carried in my heart long after. Of course within that 4 years, I have been through some struggles in there, interesting stories I have, even misleading ones.

But I do not write this to complain my lungs out and tell you my lame teenage experience, even if I am entitled the right to because this is my blog, it is registered in my face and I am the one who is getting sued if I commit libel. Nope.

I only write this to tell you how it started, and how it will end.

This is July 2009, and I have voluntarily chose to forgive Mr Cheli Tamilselvam, who did not think he has ever wronged against me and is never apologetic. Regardless, after 7 years of indecision, I now choose to forgive him, with all my heart, mind and soul. With the power vested upon me by God for the right to choose, to believe, to decide and to act, I hereby pardoned you.

Hahahahahahahahaha

Okay, now that I'm done with Cheli, let's see who's next on the list.............. Adolf Hitler! Ah, what the hell, fuck the Nazis.

Top Ten Signs You Think Like a Man

2009-07-06T20:42:00.009+08:00

10. You spend a lot of money and time just to get a break up.

9. The only way you thought you can take a little bit back from a relationship is to have sex.

8. You don't think woman understand no.9 because they are not the one who keeps on paying for everything.

7. Understanding from a woman is a luxury in a relationship.

6. More often than not, you don't think you are going to survive your current relationship.

5. Marriage is no play, we should have all the time we need to decide up till we're 35 if we are ready and you need to be patient.

4. You always think so far ahead from your partner, if she thinks getting married next year, you think about your kids' college fund.

3. Career and job is very important to you because you are bound to spend a part of your life just footing bills.

2. We think feminists are bias when they say men and women should be treated equal. In the modern world, we give them job, work, money, education. They give us a piece of their mind.

1. We sort of know the reason why men are more prone to have heart attacks and cardiac arrests!

I Used to Rule The World

2009-07-05T00:31:00.005+08:00

Super Short Talk: This is what I don't like about journalism, they say half don't say the other half, not sensational enough.

I do not care. This is me. I do not care about what people will say, I do not care about what people will think. I figured life is too short to bother too much. I did not know where I adopted such attitude towards life. I do not know if it is right. But I do not care.

I decide what I believe, I decide my faith. I decide what I want to wear, I decide what I want to say. I decide when to speak, when to stand, when to sit and when to keep quiet. I do not care what others will think, I do not care if they like it, I do not care if they don't.

I've decided life is too short to bother so much.

Opinions I have heard many, most of them rubbish to my ears. Few are good, and to them I take heed. I do not worry if people look up or down at me, they are the ones who should be mindful instead, if I even care about their very existence.

I used to have some self-esteem, I used to have some confidence. Now, I have none. For the moment I chose not to care about them anymore, I became my own self-esteem, and I became my own confidence.

One minute I have dignity, the other minute it is gone. I tried looking for it, I searched my heart and I searched my soul. And then I remember, I left it in a deserted street in one of my dreams. A dream which I could not get back into, a street I do not know the name. Who cares about dignity and pride when there are more important things to do.

I do not care, for all I ever need, is a chair to sit in front of a very nice view, a beautiful river perhaps, a pair of boobs maybe, and a can of beer of course.

The Bigger Man in You

2009-07-01T02:19:00.003+08:00

I always believe how big a person is is never determined by how much he has, but by how much he is willing to give. And by how much he is willing to give, I do not mean just money. I guess the world has long limited their capacity to give, to share, to contribute and to love.

In between the needs and wants of us humans, money is never enough to satisfy. The more we now have today will only lead us astray, seeking for even more tomorrow. If there ever was a limit to our pursuit, it might as well be infinity.

So how can we, in our insignificant self play our part to be of any good to this world? I do not know, even if I do, my ideas would at best be theoretical.

Today I speak to thee, as a poor unfortunate soul. In neither possession of power nor influence to make the slightest difference in the world. So I hereby decide to make none. None to give, none to share, none to love and none to all.

It is only until I started thinking like that when it dawned upon me, life would truly become meaningless if you have decided to live for only yourself. That is why I also believe,

Nomatter how small we are, there is always one person we can bless.

Nomatter how poor we are, there is always a smile we can share.

Nomatter how selfish we are, if we would only try, there is always a bigger man in me and in you.

Good day sir. This is the first of July.

China is a Hard Place to Live

2009-06-27T00:52:00.001+08:00

I recently read a post about China's college entry test in NY Times. And I just thought of quoting parts of the papers and explain to you why you are a loser in exam and ultimately life. For a start, I am a professional in loserism, I'm such a loser I nearly choose to major in it in college.

I never scored straight As in any exam and once scored a "0" for English dictation when I was 5. It's amusing that I am now blogging and you are reading it, some people even think I write good stuffs. While me, I find it difficult to even differentiate between my writings and a piece of shit, I pretty much treat them equal. I play badminton and table tennis, I pretend I know how to swim but I never know how to play "hot" sports like basketball or football. Despite my indisputable charm, I am still struggling to shed a few kilos from my slightly overweight body.

When all things fail, the only hope for me is to be born into a rich and loaded family. Money can't buy happiness, but it can rent it for a long long time says Garfield. But nah, it didn't work out the way I want, as a bonus, I even got a brother who is a kidney patient. What do you call it when you have neither wealth nor health? I call it "lucky to be still alive". Me, you, the rest of the world, we might have our weaknesses and lacks, but I don't see myself as a loser. It is not your lack of achievements which makes you a loser, it is when you choose to let those things define you. That's when you become a loser. A big one.

Beautiful clothes, car and houses are great. Popular brands and fashionable gadgets are excellent. I totally support them but I also think that if a person's self-esteem is build around clothes, shoes and watch. Then that person had hardly found any self-esteem. Anyway this is me, I had in mind started writing to tell you why you are a loser, I end up telling why you are not. I am despicable.

TIANJIN, China — For the past year, Liu Qichao has focused on one thing, and only one thing: the gao kao, or the high test.Fourteen to 16 hours a day, he studied for the college entrance examination, which this year will determine the fate of more than 10 million Chinese students. He took one day off every three weeks.

Families pull out all the stops to optimize their children’s scores. In Sichuan Province in southwestern China, students studied in a hospital, hooked up in oxygen containers, in hopes of improving their concentration.

Cheating is increasingly sophisticated. One group of parents last year outfitted their children with tiny earpieces, persuaded a teacher to fax them the questions and then transmitted the answers by cellphone. Another father equipped a student with a miniscanner and had nine teachers on standby to provide the answers. In all, 2,645 cheaters were caught last year.

If only my dad would do something like that, I would have scored STPM with 4As. And who cares which University is No.1 when China alone has 1900 institutions of higher learning.

The night before the exam, he lingered at his parents’ bedside, unable to sleep for hours. “I was so nervous during the exam my mind went blank,” he said. He scored 432 points out of a possible 750, too low to be admitted even to a second-tier institution.

Silence reigned in the house for days afterward. “My mother was very angry,” he said. “She said, ‘All these years of raising you and washing your clothes and cooking for you, and you earn such a bad score.’

“I cried for half a month.”

Then the family arrived at a new plan: He would enroll in a military-style boarding school in Tianjin, devoting himself exclusively to test preparation, and retake the test this June.

A military-style boarding school, why didn't I think of that? All I did was gave up blogging for 18 months and don't play facebook. (Actually we thought of that but just as a fantasy because you know Najib was the Minister of Defence then, how would we dare to have anything to do with the Military and well, bombs)

Anyway, this is my personal favourite.....

Ms. Li said she learned the hard way about the school’s strict regimen. When her cellphone rang in class one day, the teacher smashed it against the radiator. Classes continue for three weeks straight, barely interrupted by a one-day break.

Yes, the teacher fucking smashed the cellphone against a radiator. I don't even know what a radiator is or why it is there, but yes, she fucking smashed it.

Ms. Li’s breakfast was a favorite among test-takers: a bread stick next to two eggs, symbolizing a 100 percent score.

I'll tell you what I had for breakfast.....

A hot dog cut short wearing a vegetable cap with white buttons signifying the erected penis of a eunuch. No matter how hard you try, you just can't get her high. And that's for today.

I Can Rant Like You Too

2009-06-23T00:46:00.009+08:00

A few days ago, upon the release of the local public University admission result, I was asked to go to a little gathering with some 20 friends and teachers. From my twitter, it is obvious some has already learnt that I was not accepted into any local public university (which is run by the federal government or the great Barisan Nasional). Normally, when you apply to them, you are required to fill up 8 choices, and the government will try to give you a course from which you choose. If you do not fit into the 8 choices you choose, they will ask if you want to be "lelong", which means they will simply throw you any leftover courses, which often times are useless ones. It is not unusual to see words like "haiwan, tumbuhan or ikan" appearing in your degree when you are being "lelong".

I being a smartass refused to be "lelong" so the government did not give me anything at all. I guess this is liken to what the Japanese call an "honour death". But of course I knew this was coming, so I had made plans earlier. Oh yes, I was going to talk about the gathering.

C.L. is one of my longest friend, to date he has been around for the past 12 years. He is a good student with a above average result of CGPA 3.5 in STPM. After STPM, he tried to apply to NTU, NUS but to no avail. Later, he was admitted into USM to do chemical engineering but for 16 hours only before USM made the infamous blunder and rejected him. Now finally, he was accepted into a public university, but into something he don't like to do, his 8th choice as a matter of fact. So after all these months of mental torture, he is in a state of despair. After much thought, he now decided to take pharmacy in a private institution. That night, he went with me to the gathering, and just before he could take a seat, one the of teachers, a woman (I have to stress this strongly in this case), right away started rambling to him how bad his decision was, how bad his choice of University was, how terrible it is and she continued on and on pouring buckets of cold water for the next 25 minutes if not 30. Her voice literally quacks like a duck. And I was furious to see her do that to my friend.

If it were not for my other 20 ex-classmates and friends who were there, I would have throw some money on the table and left. Ya, just like what you usually see in the movie, it happens in real life. At the end, the only thing I could do was to show a pissed off face, hoping she in her insensitivity will somehow get the hint that people are unhappy. Even friends sitting beside me started to whisper into my ears that she is being bitchy. And WE DON'T NEED THIS RIGHT NOW.

As much as I like to shout "CIBAI" in a empty elevator or joke out loud with close friends over dinner. In public places with usual friends or acquaintances, I still enjoy a certain degree of politeness. It is social etiquette 101. We are gentlemen, we do not rant in public and we do not shout, if there is something we cannot agree on, we take it out gently even if we don't want to. You want to shout, scold, ramble and have sex, we do it in private. Social etiquette 101, 8 years old, English tuition class, grade 3, 1997. You bet the 10 years of English tuition my father sent me is not wasted. I don't know what kind of family some of these people come from. Even today, my father would still constantly say things like "don't quarrel with your friends, don't be rude with people outside" to me.

Men love women, we love sweet women that say nice things, that are polite, that know how to carry themselves around. The kind of women we are afraid of are not fat women or ugly women. We are afraid of women that will "SIA SOI" us in public. We are afraid of their mouth and the things they say, their 9 feet long tongue that may embarrass us in any way. Don't ask why men like to gather around men and talk among themselves most of the time. Because our "water face " is very important, can you please not drop it for us? We don't ask very much really, we will do nice things in return, just give us a little peace sometime.

Proverbs 25:24 "It is better to dwell in the corner of the housetop, than with a brawling woman in a wide house"

In 2009 68.9% students who are admitted into Local Public University are Malay, 25% are Chinese, the rest are Indians and other races. Malay students were admitted via Matrculation, Chinese and Indians were admitted via STPM. Don't even get me started on which type of people get what kind of course, but anyway welcome to 1Malaysia.

EL NiNo Burito is Spanish

2009-06-19T11:00:00.002+08:00

The weather in Kuching is getting warmer than ever. God must be punishing us for supporting BN. I knew this would happen somehow when you vote for the wrong team. Now that Satan has taken over us, we will all be burnt up. This is clearly the only logical explanation I could have think of.

I believe many of us do not know how to read a weather report properly. So allow me with the little that I know enlighten you. First of all, don't read it.

If you want to know the current weather just look out at the window.

Both you and I know very clearly, the reason we have weather reports on our cellphone is for show offs. We are Malaysians, we do not appreciate the nature, we do not go for picnic outings, we do not lay a piece of stupid cloth in the park, sit on it and eat sandwich while discussing the latest show on Disney channel. Instead we complain about hot weather in an air-coned room.

What about tomorrow, we want to know the weather tomorrow so that we can make plans in advance. This is Malaysia, you expecting a blizzard anytime soon? We are Malaysians, if we want to go shopping it doesn't matter if a volcano erupted in the middle of the mall. As long as the lava doesn't get us, we continue shopping. That having said I will marry anyone who can pick me the overprice blue check shirt in Esprit. Depending on whether it is American size or not, I sometimes wear XL, but on the record, I will tell you I only wear L because I am slim, hot, beautiful, sexy and you have never met me. If you see someone who resembles me but weight around let's say 80kg on the street, don't bother wondering, it's definitely not me. What was I saying again, yes, hot weather.

The weather is so hot, I can sweat even when I'm taking a shower. Besides my theory of we getting punished for voting Satan, there is of course some other trivia reported in the newspaper. They call it the El Nino phenomena. The last El Nino phenomena happened in 2006, ended in early 2007. And now it is back in 2009 because we voted Satan. So it seems this is an unusual phenomena where the pacific ocean warms up and part of southeast Asia goes warm with it. Of course I could have explain this more thoroughly with you if I am a meteorologist, but the problem is I'm not. Sorreee.

It has been a long time since I visited xiaxue's blog. I didn't even know she changed her blog template. When I visited it for the first time after 2 years of absence, I nearly fell off my chair at the bombastic header which is her picture. In comparison to her, I definitely lack many qualities to be a bimbly popular blogger who is just spectacular. Some say it's craptacular, I think it's fair.

To think about it, I should have just put this as my header.

But of course, I certainly don't dream that much to be a popular blogger anymore. Gone are the days of me indulging on such wishful thinkings. Nowsaday I focus more on Hollywood. I could have write very good sitcoms and shows. Unfortunately I'm just one of the many people who are stumbled by geographical reasons. When you are born in Satan's turf, you can't really do much but to grow as a devil. Or maybe demon. I wonder if it is just me but I kept thinking this picture looks very much alike Su Qi.

Let's Teach English in Malay

2009-06-15T10:26:00.000+08:00

Asked about the possibility that the policy on the teaching of Mathematics and Science in English would be scrapped Dr Mahathir said: “I feel very sorry. In future, all Malays and Malaysians will be stupid.” - The Star

The Education Minister said it was a revelation to him as he had always thought that it was a prerequisite (one have to pass English in order to pass SPM) since students had to learn English in school.He was also shocked to learn that national schools no longer taught English grammar - The Star

I am one of those privilege student, who got to experience teaching of science and mathematics in both languages, English & Malay. Up till form 5 I study them in Malay and form 6 in English. I do not think any parent can qualify themselves to comment on this matter more than I do. They sit on the rooftop and speal, I went to the war and bleed.

I have to agree with Dr Mahathir that in future all Malays and Malaysian will be stupid, not that we are very smart to begin with. Just even more stupid if we scrapped off the importance of English. The language is by far the world's language. Even though Mandarin is gaining a more important role, it is still 50 years behind to even come close to rival English. The Malay language on the other hand, is only important to preserve the precious culture and history of the Malay people.

I speak, read and write in all 3 languages fluently. Which again put me on top of the chain to comment because a majority of Malaysians don't do so. No kidding, bite me.

It is true when some argue that no nation in the world has ever become smarter, or invented greater things just because they adopted another language. I am amused they actually think Malaysians would ever have the chance to create, invent or achieve great discoveries. Our nation is so far left behind that we are now at best, only able to imitate and follow the footsteps of others in achieving greater substance. Not in my lifetime will Malaysia be able to come up with something so amazing it can impress others.

Look at our Malaysian Guinness book of records and see what you can find. The only thing Malaysian can truly do is coming up with the tallest things, biggest things, longest things. Like the biggest roti canai or the longest Kuih Lapis. When was the last time we patented a marvellous invention. When my brother, the so called scholar from the most prestigious University in Malaysia wanted to patent his method of producing bio-diesel with jathropha seeds. He was restricted because an American had already patented something similar beforehand with soya beans.

We need to adopt the English language. Not that I hate the Malay language, if I am truly racist, I would have uphold Mandarin instead of English. We have to admit that English is a more versatile language and is able to express more accurately than Malay which is at best a lingua franca. A simple language to help communications in ancient tradings. It amuses me when I see poets like A.Samad Said, going around and shout that the goverment is killing the Malay language. We are not interested in killing the Malay language. Neither the goverment nor the Chinese. You can blame the goverment all you want, I enjoy seeing them die, but Chinese people do not, will not, and will never do things that does not directly or indirectly benefit ourselves. The death of your culture does not benefit us a bit.

I think we should preserve the Malay language and we are doing it well. Like we are making passing Bahasa Malaysia as a compulsory to pass SPM. We also teaches history and moral in the Malay language. Which is good. But when it comes to scienctific subjects, we have to learn how to compromise in order to improve, the uses of English is far better. Obviously the Malay literature association who shouted loud against the usage of English in Science and Mathematics do not understand such things because they engulfed themselves in too much literature the only person who seems right are themselves. What can I say....

I am very much of a poet too.

别人叫你吃大便,
你叫他人吃大便,
大家一起吃大便,
敢问究竟谁是贤.

多少风雨几回路,
纠纷斗争不为苦,
五世文明寻觅长,
真理自私难变善.

Saya suka pakai Blackberry
Awak suka pakai Nokia
Asyik ingat orang nak awak mati
Perjuangan akhirnya tetap disia-sia

Terbit siang terbit malam
kolek-kolek sampan mengayuh
Jangan sebab bahasa awak terbeban
Janganlah sesekali mencabar Kerajaan

Whatever it is, just don't use Mandarin to teach science & maths. Chemistry in Chinese is horrible. Mandarin, cantonese, hokkien at best should only be a communicative language used to tell dirty jokes . Poets, scientist, a life is not complete unless you've tasted a little bit of both worlds, karp pui!

What do you mean when you say I am going to become "nothing"

2009-06-11T00:40:00.002+08:00

Make yourself a cup of coffee for this is going to be a long fun ride......

Sleep comes easy to me most of the nights. But there are nights when I lie in bed and no matter how hard I try I just couldn't go to sleep. I don't know if it's just me or everybody else does that too. At that point of time, my mind will most certainly start to wander around and think of the most ridiculous ideas. Most of them are not important, most of them are petty and all of them are irrelevant.

For example I thought of how it will be when I die. I imagined the last moments of my life and thought it through. Technically I rehearsed it, remind me to tell that to my children. "Oh boy, I'm just dying, don't be so emo, I've rehearsed this scene over and over again since I was 18. And don't try to comfort me with some biblical phrases, when I was 20, I had the mind of Socrates, now that I'm 75, no one on earth is wiser than me, now, can you go check if kennysia is still updating his blog? No way he gets to live longer than me, damn it"

I know it's very irrelevant to think about death and growing old when my penis has practically never seen a vagina. But I couldn't sleep. Who are we kidding after all, both you and I know the day will finally come, haven you give it a thought? Of course, I didn't write this post just to tell you to think about the day you're going to die, I think we have a common understanding here that I don't care about other people except for myself. No kidding, it took a lot of effort, sweats and tears for me to learn how to be ignorant and selfish. No one is born evil, we just pick it up along the way. Hahaha. So in one of those sleepless nights, I thought to myself "what's next after I die?" "Will I be in Heaven?" "Is Heaven real?"

Hey hey hey, don't panic, I am not going to preach Jesus here. Your salvation is absolutely none of my concern. And I really mean it, do you think I care if you go to hell? Wait, let me close my eyes and seek my conscience a minute.... Ummm.........Nope. I don't really care.

Some people believe in Heaven, some people don't. Many people believe when they die, they will just be gone and become "nothing". And boy, it is very hard to illustrate "nothing", because there is literally nothing to illustrate. But hail to the Lord in one of those sleepless nights, I saw it. And I refuse to believe it. I refuse to believe that when I die, I will become "nothing". And I refuse to believe that when you die, you will become "nothing" too. If you'd see it my way, you'd do the same.

Do you remember where were you or what were you doing in 1889? Do you remember how the world was like that year? No you don't. Because you didn't exist during that time. But history told us that in 1889, there was an eclipse seen over parts of California on the 1st of January. The Coca-Cola company was founded the same year and Eiffel Tower opened for the first time in Paris. But where were you? During that year, Nitendo was founded and plenty of boys as pretty as Zac Efron played it, lived it, woman that sang like Mariah Carey also lived and boobs bigger than Pamela Anderson were. But we don't know their names and we don't know how pretty they looked, because in 1889, we were "nothing". We had no memory.

100 years later in 1989 ~~as prophesied~~, I was born. I, like you guys, literally became "something" from "nothing". I am proud to say that I was nobody then, I am somebody now, not that I did something great but because I was born. I had missed 6000 years of civilisation, I missed 6000 years of Pamela Anderson and Zac Efron with different faces but the same quality. Today I am here, living and writing to you. And you Mr World, if you with all your genius is telling me today that my life here is going to last just another 50 years. And after that I will die and become nothing again. Exactly like what I used to be 100 years ago. If that is true, then I will really like to die now.

This life is not worth living if at the end of the day, we're all just gonna die and disappear into thin air. What's the point of living this life when suffering, challenging, hard earth life is the only thing we get. When I think with my head, it is already very hard to sum this earth and all that's in it into mere science. And it is even harder when I lay by the beach and see the stars in the night and the constellation in the sky. I cannot become nothing once again. When God decided to create me and make me me, I cannot just snap into thin air like I have never existed before.

The little twinkling star that you see at night, if you go close enough, it is really a freaking giant fireball. Science cannot procreate itself, God can. Therefore I believe God created me. And He intend for me to live on. You too.

The whole idea of God, some people find very hard to believe in. We always want to try to rationalize things out, turn everything explainable in science, and anything unexplainable with such we call it bullshit. Have it ever occurred to you, that we in all our intelligence, still there are certain things we just cannot comprehend, no matter how hard we try? No, because you are human and you think are smartest of all.

Let me put it this way, have you ever tried teaching a dog how to read? No, because you know dogs in all their genius and intelligence, JUST CAN'T READ. And you're right. So why is it so hard to believe that there are certain things we just cannot comprehend?

I hope I've painted you a picture with my 1000 words here. Don't believe the numbers? Count it dawwwwg.