Monday, November 15, 2010

I have been fine

"From my facebook note"

I have been fine. That's if you do care about my well being. Although there are times when I don't feel great, nobody wakes up every morning feeling like he is the king of the earth. I am a very regular person, almost like you. Of course there are probably a few of you who are reading, you probably wouldn't want to agree that we are the same. Mostly because you are an arrogant person thinking that your acheivements should be respected and admired. It often puzzle me if one is so great, why are they spending time acknowledging me disacknowledging them?

All greatness is built upon humility. Not the other way round.

To write something correctly and to write something interestingly isn't the same thing. I have been interesting.

This morning over breakfast my pastor jokingly said a new covenant Rabbi is like an oxymoron. They can't co-exist together. I replied religiously, saying which is why this is something new, a new creation. We all laughed. And then I said a guy from church in west Malaysia cannot understand why I had been angry with my former pastor, as he had experienced similar thing. I said that's probably because he's like 30-40 years old when he left church? I was 13 when I got hammered with ridiculous counselling, spent years being discriminated in a church I faithfully attend as believing in ocultic doctrines. My teenage years were beautiful just as it was painful. I was just a kid.

But anger can only last that long, we all learn how to forgive in time. Now we laugh over it. There are no wounds, only scars. I keep them to remind myself that the Lord has been good. Just as He always will be.

I am so sorry if I am not smart enough to write something more intellectual or impressive. I'm known to be a very simple person. It's very difficult to live a life trying to impress people and gain acceptance all the time. You're only sensational when there're people to love and hate you at the same time.

So I have been fine. I do sports, I eat my vegetables, I go to church and read the Word, I got some time to spare. I got plans, I plan to stay calm and keep on believing that miracles happen to people who believe them :o)

Sunday, November 7, 2010

Live About Being a Christian

If you don't take time away from the routine of the day and reflect a little about your life. It can slip away so easily you wouldn't even realize it. So every now and then I would sit down like this, I would take some time off, just to see how am I going about in life. Am I doing what I am supposed to do, or have I gone astray.

I do not have a very regular life, not the one I wished I had nor would I choose the same road twice if given another chance. We don't get to choose everything in life, esspecially those pre-determined factors. But how we deal with it or Whom we choose to believe, that we determine.

I guess by now you have realized I spelt the word Whom with a capital letter. The greatest decision I have made in life, to say it plainly is to believe in Jesus Christ and God Himself. I am not going to convince you to join Christianity, my imperfection is glaringly revealed in my lack of interest to bother about your salvation. I am here to declare the gospel, in the clearest way, as accurately as I know how, not to sell it.

I'm afraid the church that I know of, might not be the same as you have perceived. For a start church is not a place where we go and learn what is right or wrong. People know what is right and wrong. They just don't have the power to do the right thing all the time. We all struggle in this area. And some of us feel bad about ourselves for the things we've done. We don't need another religious teacher to remind us of what we should and shouldn't do. What we need is a Saviour.

There are no formulas on how to be a good Christian. Mostly because there is never such a thing as a good Christian. One can be better than the other, but none can be good enough.

My former pastor used to ask us to wake up at 5.30 a.m. in the morning to pray. Read the bible at least one chapter a day.They call it spiritual dicipline, they also have spiritual warfare from time to time, it was mostly chanting against the air. It is believed that when you do such things, somehow you will get closer to God. They did it in vain. I know so because I did it with them.

I am not asking you to try another method that works, I am asking you to please stop trying. We tried so much, we got so full of ourselves. We wanted to do so many things. For a moment I thought I was God. Trying to save this world from spiritual warfare. Have you gone astray?

This is the gospel. Jesus loves me so much, His love was beautiful, but my sins were ugly. Against a God that cannot possible tolerate my sinful ways, Jesus paid a ransom to save me. He paid up His life, so that I may have mine. I cheated death.

And so it was the story goes, it was never about me. It was and still is, about Him. I don't go to church to learn what I should do, I go to church to learn what He has done. There is nothing left for us to do because Jesus has done it all, it is therefore - finished.

Our lives is a finished story written about on a cross. One might worry about what He should do now, because I've clearly said so that there is nothing left to do. But human, being human, we must do something less we can't rest. I say you stand on the mount of crucifiction, and you look upon the now empty cross. Perhaps if you stared long enough. You might just realize what I am trying to say all this while.