Real Mature

At every point of life, I try my best to be the better man. The one who meets the expectation of those around me. Unfortunate for the world, in all attempts that I've tried, I failed them terribly. Why? Because contrary to popular beliefs, I am actually human like you. Believe it.


It's always easy to criticize. Life is like a huge stage, while every audience can criticise the performers on stage, most of them can't even perform one bit. To be fair, they paid for the tickets to watch the show. But in life, no one pays to see us, they just hit us all along the road.


The hardest part to accept these criticism is, sometimes they are true. If a rapist accuse another rapist of rape, is he correct? Yes he is, but is he qualified to point that out? Again, by law, yes he is and he should. But does the whole scenario sounds fair or right? Not really.


So how do we deal with social situations as such, when an idiot calls us idiots because we really are idiots. I've tried different approaches to find the best way to handle this, I can scold them back, reason it out, forget it, cut contact. But the best way really, is merely to accept it.


Does that mean we lose? Yes. We lose. We lose our dignity, we lose our face, we lose the right to get angry at people for whatever reason. But instead of focusing what we lose, there are actually gains out of it. We gain a friend, we avoided an argument, if we change, we gain respect and ultimately we become better people.


I know this is a lot to take in, and I know it's even harder to perform. But this is the part of growing up that I've learnt recently. For most of the time in the past, I am priviledge to have older friends and brothers around to accomodate to my crap. This time around, I have to accomodate others. And that my friend is real mature.

My Updates

When every picture of you looks bad, publish someone else’s photo instead.

This is Aris, my University buddy, hostel mate, house mate, church mate, whatever mate

My life is okay here, everything is still working out relatively fine. I have two group of friends to hang out with. One being my old time and all time Kuching kakis and the other being my Indonesians group that somehow dominated Malaysia private education in a subtle way. Statistic says we currently have 1.8 million Indonesian students and workers in Malaysia. That’s 1 in every 24 of us. It’s more than enough to qualify as one of the minority group here. But of course, we will discriminate you. And it’s fair, because I belong to the second largest group in Malaysia, and I am still “like that what”.


And oh, I haven got the time to find other friends and cousins in KL, but you bet I will.


I am still going to church. Ironically I go to church even more regularly than I was in Kuching, which is not my initial plan at all. At first I thought of skipping church for a while and play. But that didn’t happen so well, I started attending an Indonesian Church from my second week. And it’s kind of good. It work out for me pretty well I’ll tell you why. All my Christian friends would know that I am very particular with the sermon preached, you preach bullshit to me, I’ll give you a bullshit face. But this, this is perfect for me. I would go to this church and enjoy the worship (which is good), and when it comes to sermon, I can just sit down and chill because if I don’t listen carefully, I wouldn’t understand what the preacher is saying. And I don’t even need to because I’m the only Malaysian there!

If you can't drink beer, drink something else that looks like it

Anyway I’m visiting another local church this week because a hot chick invited me to. It’s a sin to turn that down so I will have to make some sacrifices. Also by the way, I have not yet found any pretty Malaysian girl of whom I may devour in this place. Economy is very bad in this competitive market.


Moving on, my midterm and finals are coming. So I will be keeping myself busy. And yeah, I’m losing weight here. I think lah……

I Crush You

If I could rename "love at first sight", I would call it crushes. But of course I couldn't do that. It's like when people try to flirt in the movies, they say "If I can rearrange the alphabet, I'll put "U" and "I" together". Yeah right, like they can rearrange the alphabet.


But if I may for once be a love guru, I'd say the problem with crushes are that they often come too fast and leave too soon. Leaving you wondering what's wrong with the world, you, him, her and everyone else.

Some things last for a long time. Others have a shorter lifespan. But the fact that they will someday end always brings us a sad moment. Sometimes we're sad for a day, sometimes longer. But even sadness expires when people move on. Which brings us to a technical question that is, if I know that the sadness I feel today will soon go away in a month, isn't what I feel now very superficial?

It may be. But it's not always the case. Because we didn't intend for crushes to happen. Most of the time, it just crashes on us. Very quickly.

The essence of writing a profound statement is to mix truth, emotions and plenty of erroneous personal opinions.

Why I am not afraid of the government

I am still intrigued a little when people think that what I write on my blog can possibly lead me to harms way by the government. Obviously this world has over-estimated my capabilities in so many ways. Which is a common and understandable but not excusable mistake. But will I ever get caught by what I write in my blog? No. Why? Because I know what I am writing and again, really what I write and what I think is not so important to the government.

Rule no.1, I do not touch sensitive issues. Never. If I talk about race, all I will ever say is to promote unity. Because I am not racist. Even when my race is not treated with all fairness here, still, all I promote is unity and love when it comes to races. I may criticize government policies, I do not hurt other races. Because they too are human and I show respect to that. Rule no.2, I proudly accept Bahasa Malaysia as the official language of our country. Even when I have dispute between the language used in the teaching of science and maths, I never say we should not use Bahasa Malaysia as the national official language. Rule no.3, I shall never in my life insult others' religion. Even if they do not share the same religion as I am, I set my boundaries clear cut. Rule no.4, I do not insult the royals. Even if the news has lots of scandals and gossips for me to make fun of, I don't think they are so interesting. Rule no.5, I do not make up stories and slam people baselessly. What I say is merely a repetitive of news, facts, truth with the addition of my own opinions and jokes into them.


If I say Chua Soi Lek is an adulterer? Am I wrong? Can I be charged? Didn't the Star already published that many times over? If I say Ong Kee Tiat is alleged to have received 10 million ringgit from Tiong King Kong, am I wrong? Didn't all major newspaper already publish it? If I say don't vote for Barisan Nasional? Am I wrong? Can't I have an opinion about the government and decide which team I want to support? Yeah, but then can I express that view on my blog? Why not? I do not have a lot of faith in Barisan Nasional, but I don't think they are interested to jail me yet because of my opinion. They are crazy in many ways, but not to this extend to block every citizen's constitutional right for the freedom of expression. Please don't regard me so highly. I am like God, but still I'm not really God. I'm just like you and my penis is not even long.


When you read news portal like malaysiakini, malaysiainsider and 1000 more local political blogs. You will find so many more serious bloggers and journalist which are 10 times more critical than I can ever be. Me, I'm just a jester. I'm not a blogging virgin. This blog is 1 year old, my previous blog was 2 years old. I also took a 18 months break in between the two blogs to grow up. I can't say I'm mature now, since life is literally an endless learning process, but yes, I have an idea of what I am doing. SO NO! YOU WONT SEE ME ON HEADLINES ANYTIME SOON GOING TO KAMUNTING DETENTION CENTRE!

Way back in 2007

But on top of that, I want to encourage people to write, to speak, to sing. I want to encourage people to express themselves. I want to tell the world that it is okay to say what you think is right. With all due responsibility. Because if we remain silent, we lose. If we speak up we tried. And if we persist, we win.

The Accepted Social Convention

In the process of growing up, you are likely to meet people who are smarter than you. You are also likely to meet people who are less smarter than you. Of course there are also people who are less smarter than you who thinks he is smarter than you and people who are smarter than you and look down on you at the same time. To counter with these social situations, I've come up with a formula that is,


"When a person is smart, he is obligated to tolerate others' lack of intelligence and forgive them. However when he is not so smart, all he has to do is shut up."


Believe it or not, if the society had applied my unfounded social ideas, more people would have become friends.

I respect people by these principles. Firstly I respect them for seniority. Whenever someone is significantly older than me, whether they can offer me sound opinions or not, I still have to show them a little respect for their experience and the fact that they had lived longer. But that respect is sub-standard. Secondly, I respect people for their wisdom or achievements. These are the people that really talk sense into your ears and their opinions and judgement matters. As you might have understood, I am one of those people that don't really care about the "2 cents worth opinions" of the general population. And I think the quote is stupid in itself.

If somebody regard their opinions as "2 cents worth", why do they even bother to express it to others? You might as well keep it in your diary, journal or your blog. Because throwing 2 cents around at people's face is socially unacceptable. 20 dollars on the other hand is great for me. Here is the top ten list of the types of people whom I find very distasteful:

10) People who are not sure what they are saying, but still keeps on talking.


9) People who are smart, and is trying to impress upon you how smart they are.


8) People who talks everything base solely on their own perspective and position, unable to put themselves in others' shoes.


7) People who keeps talking and never listen.


6) People who think they are funny when nobody is laughing at their jokes.


5) People that insist on their idealogies and opinions disregarding others'.


4) No heart, no emotions, no feelings, no understanding.


3) Agressive people who want to express themselves to the fullest extend everytime without practising restrains. Even if they are right, they look very wrong.


2) People who talks to you like you know nothing and they know everything.


1) Chinese who support Barisan Nasional!



Reading that, you might not agree that you have fallen on one of those listed. But I'm sure you have the same opinion that these people are annoying at times. How do I know? Maybe I might just be one of them.


Except for no.1, I am critical about that! Roarr.....